RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0

It makes me neither of those things I just think it's incredibly rude and ignorant.

When you can't defend you deflect. Shāh māt.

Well I disagree. I don't think it makes them either of those things. I also think it's rude and arrogant to expect other people to speak in a language that satisfies me.

And science backs this up- venting just breeds more anger and frustration.

Sources?

It makes me neither of those things I just think it's incredibly rude and ignorant.

When you can't defend you deflect. Shāh māt.

Well I disagree. I don't think it makes them either of those things. I also think it's rude and arrogant to expect other people to speak in a language that satisfies me.

There's a simple rule for this. When in a group of mixed language speakers you all try to speak in the language that excludes the least people from the conversation.

I guess your reaction to someone complaining that their friends have conversations in Afrikaans would be something like 'why don't you go and learn Afrikaans then?'

It makes me neither of those things I just think it's incredibly rude and ignorant.

When you can't defend you deflect. Shāh māt.

Well I disagree. I don't think it makes them either of those things. I also think it's rude and arrogant to expect other people to speak in a language that satisfies me.

There's a simple rule for this. When in a group of mixed language speakers you all try to speak in the language that excludes the least people from the conversation.

Not in Martin's world. He doesn't even think staff at the mother ****** immigration office should be able to communicate with you in English.

Admit you are wrong once in a while and you'll be a better person for it Martin.

Does the ranting and the raving and the hating make your life any better? Has it helped you? Judging by how miserable a lot of the haters come across as, it hasn't. And science backs this up- venting just breeds more anger and frustration.

But just like your constant defense that this place is just a time killer during your (seemingly) hours upon hours of free time, despite your 5000 posts and  multi paragraph screeds, it's the same for everyone else I would imagine.

Do you think people venting on here are going out into the real world and doing the same? I wouldn't think so. You are probably right that it doesn't really help much, venting here, but...so? Does your dross help anyone? Does it help you? I would bet that if we all met up, we would all find that everyone is pretty normal and similar to every other person you've met during your time in Korea. I don't think anyone is getting badly effected by what they read here. If they are, they should really take a break.

It's just a bunch of people typing shit on a website. If it's veering too negative for you and bringing you down, then take a break. I've been reading this place off and on for almost 6 years. It's about the same as it always has been. I would say there has been an uptick in the amount of pro-Trump "alt-right" type posting. But maybe that is just a reflection of society. That shit is boring and embarrassing to read. But as for the general negativity? This place is pretty mild. Save me the hand wringing.

Nearly all of my students keep doing these stupid hand signals from something called Tick Tock. It looks like some version of itsy bitsy spider but 50 times more annoying.

And science backs this up- venting just breeds more anger and frustration.

Sources?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/high-octane-women/201102/feel-venting-you-may-want-think-again-literally
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~bbushman/PSPB02.pdf
http://psycnet.apa.org/record/2006-21781-000

Relying on Anger and lashing out as a way to reduce negative feelings only teaches your that lashing out is a way to feel better.

Now, there are caveats about how you vent. For example "venting" by hitting a bunch of golf balls or chopping some wood or whatever is probably beneficial. Venting by insulting entire ethnicities online, probably not.

And we can just use our anecdotal evidence- Look at the haters, do they seem like a cheerful bunch? Has their ranting and venting made things easier or better for them? Seems like they just get angrier and angrier and write more and more angry threads and posts.

And science backs this up- venting just breeds more anger and frustration.

Sources?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/high-octane-women/201102/feel-venting-you-may-want-think-again-literally
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~bbushman/PSPB02.pdf
http://psycnet.apa.org/record/2006-21781-000

Relying on Anger and lashing out as a way to reduce negative feelings only teaches your that lashing out is a way to feel better.

Now, there are caveats about how you vent. For example "venting" by hitting a bunch of golf balls or chopping some wood or whatever is probably beneficial. Venting by insulting entire ethnicities online, probably not.

And we can just use our anecdotal evidence- Look at the haters, do they seem like a cheerful bunch? Has their ranting and venting made things easier or better for them? Seems like they just get angrier and angrier and write more and more angry threads and posts.

But you seem unhappy too.

And science backs this up- venting just breeds more anger and frustration.

Sources?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/high-octane-women/201102/feel-venting-you-may-want-think-again-literally
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~bbushman/PSPB02.pdf
http://psycnet.apa.org/record/2006-21781-000

Relying on Anger and lashing out as a way to reduce negative feelings only teaches your that lashing out is a way to feel better.

Now, there are caveats about how you vent. For example "venting" by hitting a bunch of golf balls or chopping some wood or whatever is probably beneficial. Venting by insulting entire ethnicities online, probably not.

And we can just use our anecdotal evidence- Look at the haters, do they seem like a cheerful bunch? Has their ranting and venting made things easier or better for them? Seems like they just get angrier and angrier and write more and more angry threads and posts.

But you seem unhappy too.

Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. Suffering leads to defending every perceived anti-Korean sentiments on internet message boards.

There's a simple rule for this. When in a group of mixed language speakers you all try to speak in the language that excludes the least people from the conversation.

I guess your reaction to someone complaining that their friends have conversations in Afrikaans would be something like 'why don't you go and learn Afrikaans then?'

No, my reaction would be to genuinely not give a shit if some people I'm with start speaking a different language for a bit, especially if something relating to back home gets brought up. People speaking in different languages doesn't make me uncomfortable or feel threatened or belittled. In fact, it's great to listen.

There's jokes or references that only work in one language and not the other.-*3..z.-.-......

But you seem unhappy too.

Dude, I ain't the one starting threads about to what degree Koreans wear sunglasses (seriously, WTF?) I'm the one starting threads about like, Star Trek. At least I try to have a sense of humor about things.

I'm at least trying to help things out by offering reasons why Koreans do what they do and putting it into context with the rest of humanity and offering alternative views to thinking about the situation rather than getting angry.

How exactly does a thread about Koreans and being surprised help anything?

But you seem unhappy too.

Dude, I ain't the one starting threads about to what degree Koreans wear sunglasses (seriously, WTF?) I'm the one starting threads about like, Star Trek. At least I try to have a sense of humor about things.

I'm at least trying to help things out by offering reasons why Koreans do what they do and putting it into context with the rest of humanity and offering alternative views to thinking about the situation rather than getting angry.

How exactly does a thread about Koreans and being surprised help anything?

Pointing something out doesn't mean you are angry or unhappy. It's just making a comment.

You reactions in many threads seem furious.

Why does anything here have to help anything? If someone directly asks for help or advice it's usually given in spades (See the poster who had washing machine problems). Everything else is just posting for posting sake. And yeah some of it is going to be negative. So? Some of it is just comments on stuff that happens. I don't come here to solve my life problems. If I did that I would be really, really stupid. I come here because I am killing time during the work day, reading about people who are in a similar life situation as me.

What are the big internet places for foreigners in Korea? Here, Daves is dead (kind of in part due to you), like I said r/korea is way, way more of a cesspool than this place.....the oink page? Bet you'd love that one.

Also, to you personally I will say that you do let things roll off your back here, but you also have the sense of humor of a door stop sometimes. I've always thought the meme about Americans not understanding irony or sarcasm was an over exaggeration. But you have made me rethink that. I have said some utterly preposterous things to you that were clear as a day a joke or ironic in the absolute extreme and you react as though I'm actually being serious. Like I said I'd seen you wearing a denim jacket and a maga hat. And you got all huffy and offended. Like, how the fark would I know who you are if I saw you in public. I was being stupid.

Just as much as you say you don't take this place seriously, I really don't think anyone else does too.

What are the big internet places for foreigners in Korea? Here, Daves is dead (kind of in part due to you), like I said r/korea is way, way more of a cesspool than this place.....the oink page? Bet you'd love that one.

My question is why are all the korea related "internet places" cesspools of negativity (to some degree)?

Imagine DeMartino standing in the 2 hour long line at Incheon airport with all the exhausted and disgruntled foreigners complaining about the the slowness of the line and the why can't we just use the Korean lines there aren't any Koreans here and 8 staff sitting doing nothing brigade and Tino is there in his suit standing tall, chest out, taking deep breaths of Korean air going this is the life isn't it. It doesn't get any better than this, this is the life. Back home, we'd be in the car and on the way home but I'd rather be here, living the faux Korean dream.

What are the big internet places for foreigners in Korea? Here, Daves is dead (kind of in part due to you), like I said r/korea is way, way more of a cesspool than this place.....the oink page? Bet you'd love that one.

My question is why are all the korea related "internet places" cesspools of negativity (to some degree)?

Do you really think it's just Korea? Anyone who was in Japan during it's heyday will remember Gaijinpot. That place was worse than all the Korea ones combined.
I lived in Italy and the expat forums there were just as bad too. People complaining about Italian incompetence, bragging about banging the locals, shitting on the food (yes there are people who didn't like authentic Italian food), corruption etc.

Why do people who are of the sensitive inclination call places like reddit, twitter, wherever else that lots of people get together on the internet, ""toxic""? Because places that allow a certain amount of anonymity, remote interaction, without the consequences of real life are probably going to bring out the negative side of people's natures. At least to an extent.

I'll still stand by thinking that this place is pretty mild. I'd say the more worrying thing is the gradual goober rightwing takeover that seems to have happened here. If anything stops me reading it's 10 threads, all a variation on "Trump is great. haha we owned the libs"

I have said some utterly preposterous things to you that were clear as a day a joke or ironic in the absolute extreme and you react as though I'm actually being serious. Like I said I'd seen you wearing a denim jacket and a maga hat. And you got all huffy and offended. Like, how the fark would I know who you are if I saw you in public. I was being stupid.

Pretty sure that in those cases I acknowledged that you might be taking the piss out of me, which I said was great and all in good fun.

I mean Avec does it all the time and we've gone back and forth and it's all in good fun. I'd say only Stepz and gators! are really at a different level.

Do you really think it's just Korea? Anyone who was in Japan during it's heyday will remember Gaijinpot. That place was worse than all the Korea ones combined.
I lived in Italy and the expat forums there were just as bad too. People complaining about Italian incompetence, bragging about banging the locals, shitting on the food (yes there are people who didn't like authentic Italian food), corruption etc.

Yeah I haven't used those non-korea but country-related forums, so I guess I wouldn't know. My new question would then be why are expats so toxic online? I'm part of lots of non-country related forums that aren't nearly as toxic as these seem to be (and I agree this place is pretty mild compared to r/korea and oink, but still).

I'm reminded of something Ricky Gervais said on his podcast once (and I might be paraphrasing)...

"I know the world's great, it's just that some things annoy me".

I think most of the posters here probably have the same attitude.  Sometimes it's nice to be vindicated.  You see something annoying and you're basically saying "Is everybody else seeing this??", "Is everybody else annoyed by this or is it me?"

I'm reminded of something Ricky Gervais said on his podcast once (and I might be paraphrasing)...

"I know the world's great, it's just that some things annoy me".

I think most of the posters here probably have the same attitude.  Sometimes it's nice to be vindicated.  You see something annoying and you're basically saying "Is everybody else seeing this??", "Is everybody else annoyed by this or is it me?"

Yeah, I think you're right. But very rarely do I see people post things related to the "the world's great" part of that worldview.

And science backs this up- venting just breeds more anger and frustration.

Sources?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/high-octane-women/201102/feel-venting-you-may-want-think-again-literally
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~bbushman/PSPB02.pdf
http://psycnet.apa.org/record/2006-21781-000

Relying on Anger and lashing out as a way to reduce negative feelings only teaches your that lashing out is a way to feel better.

Now, there are caveats about how you vent. For example "venting" by hitting a bunch of golf balls or chopping some wood or whatever is probably beneficial. Venting by insulting entire ethnicities online, probably not.

And we can just use our anecdotal evidence- Look at the haters, do they seem like a cheerful bunch? Has their ranting and venting made things easier or better for them? Seems like they just get angrier and angrier and write more and more angry threads and posts.

You're seeing what you want to see.
I DO NOT CONDONE, nor do I insult Korean people, they're individuals. I have my opinions about their culture, which I believe, for the most part, is no longer relevant and completely opposed to the Economic and Political model that South Koreans themselves chose to adopt. Still, cultures naturally bend and mold to suit the environment it just takes time, it's best not to force it.
As you say, venting can be done via a physical outlet like exercise, but, it can also be done via a creative or emotional outlet such as playing music, talking and writing. What people are doing here is venting using the medium of writing.

You are the one who chooses to interpret writing which is critical of Korean culture and norms as insulting ethnicities simply because it aligns with your agenda. The irony is that while you believe that venting makes one more miserable, you certainly sound like the most miserable of all.

Just let it go, dog. It's just a lame website.