RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0

It's that time of year again when a bunch of women are grasping at their boyfriends whenever they see me in the area, and often letting out super loud, super fake giggles and laughs. It's the kind of thing that happens all year 'round but it's so much more obvious and frequent during certain seasons. I'm pretty sure these are all fresh relationships and that these women just don't want any of their boy toys' attention away from them during their whirlwind 3-week romance, but it's still annoying as ****.

To the men here, I know you also experience similar, but do you notice certain times of the year when it's worse than the norm? Also, how does it normally play out for you? Do insecure boyfriends sling their arms around their ladies? Try to stare you down with a John Wayne glare? Purse their lips in an attempt at a sneer?

To clarify, I'm not talking about any time you're out on a date with someone. I'm talking about the times when you're alone and minding your own business and just trying to walk to the store or whatever.

I occasionally catch guys trying to look extra tough or cocky with their girls when they see me, just by talking louder or making bigger gestures, etc. But I think that's less due to them viewing me as any sort of threat and more just them doing goofy stuff when they see a foreigner. Who knows. Usually couples seem so completely lost in each other's attention that I doubt they even notice me walking past.

That said, couples here are way too possessive. An acquaintance of mine was saying she was sad that she lost one of her friends that she used to platonically go out for dinner with once in a while because he just got a girlfriend and he's not allowed to eat with other girls now. That's ridiculous. And yet it seems kind of the default mode, here. Max level jealousy.

Yeah, it's like, "We've known each other for 3 years. If we were gonna date/bone, it would have happened years ago."

Girls like that in my life are like sisters, the thought of sleeping with one is just............ weird.

^ yeah, it's pretty immature. Then again (and I'm gonna get roasted for this) your average Korean in their 20s does seem more immature than the same age as people back home. This has been my experience generally. Maybe because Koreans live at home, don't have to get a part time job when they're younger and have few responsibilities around the house? Just less life experience maybe

^ yeah, it's pretty immature. Then again (and I'm gonna get roasted for this) your average Korean in their 20s does seem more immature than the same age as people back home. This has been my experience generally. Maybe because Koreans live at home, don't have to get a part time job when they're younger and have few responsibilities around the house? Just less life experience maybe

Ehhh....I think Korean people who stay home develop different maturity skills, not less. There's more to maturity than paying rent. Also, the fact that 30 year olds in the West refer to basic tasks as "adulting" makes me question this maturity gap.

Ehhh....I think Korean people who stay home develop different maturity skills, not less. There's more to maturity than paying rent. Also, the fact that 30 year olds in the West refer to basic tasks as "adulting" makes me question this maturity gap.

I dunno. I learnt a hell of a lot in my early 20s just from living with friends (away from the parents) and learning how to survive on my own. I matured a lot after getting my first job too. I feel I'm much more well-rounded than if I had continued to live at home and get free food/rent/my mum doing my laundry until my 30s

Ehhh....I think Korean people who stay home develop different maturity skills, not less. There's more to maturity than paying rent. Also, the fact that 30 year olds in the West refer to basic tasks as "adulting" makes me question this maturity gap.

What different skills would those be?

1337 LoL crushin' skillz, yo!

Ehhh....I think Korean people who stay home develop different maturity skills, not less. There's more to maturity than paying rent. Also, the fact that 30 year olds in the West refer to basic tasks as "adulting" makes me question this maturity gap.

No way!  Adulting in Korea =maybe learning how to lie to your parents about sneaking out?  That's ****** it!  Its not as if they are even expected to help cook and clean and do chores around the house ..Mama does that for you.....true babies!  So they can focus on studying for exams they will already pass even if they don't write a single thing!!!  This culture mollycoddles their children, and then acts like it doesn't....so their children can act like they do "things"!  (Omg Korean tests and exams are so hard for the children and they can't focus in class because they have so much stress) .. I know before every test my students are basically GIVEN the answers!  That is not ****** normal.  It's all an act! 

I'm sorry, but if you are 19 (growing up in the West) and expected to be out of your parents' home (without any help from them...no money, no nothing) you mature really quick.   You learn how to be an adult on your own without your parents and develop a tough skin.  You learn about budgeting and how to be self-reliant. 

Koreans are still "children" until they get married in my honest opinion.   And even further, they get a wedding paid for, a house paid for full of goodies.  And even then, the parents are on call/duty 24/7 when they give birth, and live with their children cause obviously the woman is so weak and needs her mother to teach her how to be a smother.  Mom's Touch! 

.....Come on Demartino!  No one ever seems to grow up here.  Even as grown adults people act like children, and no wonder!

Don't worry, L I says that cameras everywhere lower crime.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZjmlJPJgug

Cameras everywhere DO lower crime. Crime is down worldwide. Al Qaeda and ISIS terrorism has been reduced.

Less criminals on the street. Cameras both catch and deter crime.

Facial recognition catches criminals with outstanding warrants. It catches looters. It catches arsonists. It catches terrorists. Living in a peaceful society is great.

Korea has tons of CCTV and facial recognition technology in use. And it’s a safe place to be. Don’t be a lawbreaker and you’ll have nothing to worry about. (For example, if you test positive for COVID-19, don’t violate the quarantine ... because you are being tracked.)

No way!  Adulting in Korea =maybe learning how to lie to your parents about sneaking out?  That's ****** it!  Its not as if they are even expected to help cook and clean and do chores around the house ..Mama does that for you.....true babies!  So they can focus on studying for exams they will already pass even if they don't write a single thing!!!  This culture mollycoddles their children, and then acts like it doesn't....so their children can act like they do "things"!  (Omg Korean tests and exams are so hard for the children and they can't focus in class because they have so much stress) .. I know before every test my students are basically GIVEN the answers!  That is not ****** normal.  It's all an act! 

I'm sorry, but if you are 19 (growing up in the West) and expected to be out of your parents' home (without any help from them...no money, no nothing) you mature really quick.   You learn how to be an adult on your own without your parents and develop a tough skin.  You learn about budgeting and how to be self-reliant. 

Koreans are still "children" until they get married in my honest opinion.   And even further, they get a wedding paid for, a house paid for full of goodies.  And even then, the parents are on call/duty 24/7 when they give birth, and live with their children cause obviously the woman is so weak and needs her mother to teach her how to be a smother.  Mom's Touch! 

.....Come on Demartino!  No one ever seems to grow up here.  Even as grown adults people act like children, and no wonder!

To be honest, I really think martin was hoping nobody would pick him up on this because it was a ridiculous defence of something we see here and also of what we know about the Korean family dynamics and of Koreans in their late teens/20s/30s here.   'Different maturity skills'?  Different?  Yes.  Useful skills for life?  No.  Most of your points are right and go much further than his example of just 'paying the rent' as a way of 'maturing' and being able to look after yourself.  If you're still living with your parents until you get married, and that'd be around the 30 mark here, you've not learned to be self sufficient.  We see this.  Family is viewed differently here, sure, but that doesn't mean it's conducive to developing proper life skills and developing emotionally and coping after you leave home.  Now clear off, but make sure you come home twice a year.   

And as for 'adulting', never heard of that expression.  So I'm going to assume it's only used to identify a tiny minority of people, but helps move martin's narrative along. 

You learn how to be an adult on your own without your parents and develop a tough skin.

Hmmmm... This USED to happen. These days it's all about showing you have weak skin and claiming to be offended by everything. Pulling your socks up and getting on with it only gets you so far now, much easier claiming oppression and sympathy.

It doesn't happen in Korea. People do in the most part just get on with it.

Well... There was that 'escaping the corset' bs a while back but luckily it was brushed aside pretty quickly.

"Adulting" is just comical internet slang. Refers to doing stuff that you don't really want to do but that life as an adult kind of necessitates. Often used to poke fun at oneself. It was pretty popular a few years ago but not so much now. No one has ever taken the term seriously, though, except for old men who don't understand humor they didn't grow up with, lol.

I personally think it's cute and got my mom to use it on my brother once.

You learn how to be an adult on your own without your parents and develop a tough skin.  You learn about budgeting and how to be self-reliant. 

.....Come on Demartino!  No one ever seems to grow up here.  Even as grown adults people act like children, and no wonder!

And yet so many people back home who live on their own actually don't develop tough skins or mature. I mean, heck look at some of the people here (me included) who trumpet their own maturity but seem at times to come off as rather childish and thin-skinned.

When I say different, I think Korean young adults tend to be better at accepting wisdom, working in groups, accepting discipline, maintaining schedules, setting limits on irresponsible behavior, etc.

This happened back home too with not just Korean, but also Asian young adults who had such an upbringing. Truth be told, all of them that still lived with mom and dad and spent that time studying turned out to be more stable, more responsible adults in the long run and when it came time for them to move from young-adulthood into say, parenthood, they have done a much better job. Of my Asian friends who did the "at home and study" lifestyle, all of them have stable jobs and families, earn significantly more on average, have avoided run ins with the law, have better health, lower rates of obesity, have cleaner homes, and are generally viewed as stable, responsible and dependable, if perhaps a bit boring, but then again as you approach 40 and maybe have kids, stable and a bit boring is good for family friends and people to have your kids hang out with.

Conversely a lot of people I know with great "life experience" and alleged maturity who moved out early have much more disparate outcomes. Some of really found their mark. But others have had outcomes bordering on catastrophic and a few even fatal- drug overdose, significant incarceration, unplanned pregnancy, trouble finding stable employment, bankruptcy, mental illness, anxiety and anger issues, significant injury and so on. Some are still rebelling against their parents and society as they approach 40 and sure they may have paid the bills, but they didn't mature. Now they also had the best outcomes, are the ones that actually own small businesses (for the most part) and have the greatest potential.

The "life experience" crowd may be more fun to hang around and I can relate to them better, but if I wanted to choose someone to be treasurer of an organization or choose as a godparent, I'd go with the people from the first group.

Marriage is hard enough without needing to learn how to run a household as an individual, let alone as a couple.

I respect the institution of marriage, you tough it out and you work out your problems, as best you can.

Why add "Oh shit, how do I do laundry?" into the mix.

When I say different, I think Korean young adults tend to be better at accepting wisdom, working in groups, accepting discipline, maintaining schedules, setting limits on irresponsible behavior, etc.

So, like children?

Wow!  All the Asians you knew from back home turned out awesome!  None of them are even obese.  Not that you have much credibility on here, but when you're just going to make things up out of thin air you can't lay the B.S. on so thick.  If you hope some newbie who just joined (and will take a few days to figure out you have a flexible relationship with the truth) will buy what you're saying you need to tone it down. 

I don't think it's possible to generalize with any accuracy the maturity level of people who live at home and people who don't.

I've met Koreans who live with their parents who are absolutely hopeless and have almost no life skills or work ethic. I've also met Koreans who still live with their parents who were competent, intelligent, and hard working. The same goes for the opposite. Lots of people who don't live with their parents who are still super immature and lacking a lot of pretty necessary life skills.

This can also be applied to people in our home countries.

That said, obviously living at home and having your parents do literally everything for you is going to leave you fairly stunted in terms of maturity and competency, when it comes to a lot of things.

Wow!  All the Asians you knew from back home turned out awesome!

Your hallucination about what I wrote has been noted.

Go back and read it again. Never said all Asians I knew.

truth be told, all of them that still lived with mom and dad and spent that time studying

Anyways, you're right. It's impossible that any of these people could be more mature and and stable than you and have made better life choices. You are king shit.

If you have life experience and maturity, you should be able to recognize that living at home is not very predictive of either of those things.