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  • fka
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1091

    • September 05, 2019, 06:37:44 pm
    • Seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11220 on: January 11, 2020, 09:35:18 am »
Note to BBC Scotland: If you want to preserve the union, keep the fish and chips commentary shows locked in the vault. NEVER let that shit get on the air.


  • fka
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1091

    • September 05, 2019, 06:37:44 pm
    • Seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11221 on: January 11, 2020, 10:28:35 am »
Host: Let's welcome our celebrity guest panel to tonight's episode of Watching People Eat Fish and Chips. I'm your host, Jimmy Carr!
*Applause*

JC: Our first celebrity is a one-time Page 3 model who briefly dated the associate producer. It's Emily Essex! Next, you know her as Jade Goody's Niece - and so do we! *Laughter and applause* Our final guest needs no introduction, but I'm paid to be here so I'll do it anyway *Laughter* It's Kevin Nobody, a one-episode Love Island contestant and winner of last year's I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here! *Wild cheering*

Cut to Tony's Fish and Chips, Margate.

JC: Tonight we're going to follow Britain's funniest man, Jack Whitehall, as he samples some of the Sceptred Isle's finest food.

The panel shrinks into a small frame in the right-hand corner of the screen as Whitehall receives a plate of ordinary fish and chips.

Panel (in unison): Whooooaaaaoooohhhh. ...

JGN: So delicious.

KN: Amazing!

EE: I ain't never seen nuffin' like that before.

JC: That's what the photographer said during your last shoot.

*Laughter*

EE: What's he doing now?

Whitehall splashes vinegar on his chips

JGN: That's called vinegar. Malt vinegar, I think.

Panel: Ooooohhhhhh....

KN: I heard that it's really acidic.

JC: Can he eat it? Let's watch.

Extreme close-up on Whitehall grimacing as he realizes he's added too much vinegar.

Panel: HA HA HA! HA HA HA!

*BOING! BOING! BOING! BOING!*

Panel: HA HA HA HA!

KN: Again!

INSTANT REPLAY! BOING BOING BOING!

JGN: Amazing! But look, he's eating it!

EE: He is so strong!

KN: Jimmy, can you tell us more about this plate of fish and chips? Does it come from an old family recipe?

JC: Mm, according to the production notes the owner just buys everything frozen from a cash'n'carry.

Panel: Mmmmmmmmm...

EE: So delicious.

JGN: Hey, what's that green stuff? Now THAT looks interesting.

JC: Those are called peas - hey, has anyone noticed that chanting outside? Wait, the producers are squawking on my earpiece... Oh my god, there's a riotous mob outside. They've come to take down the British establishment. They're demanding the Queen's head on a pike!

EE: Oh my god! What do we do?

JGN: Ohmygodohmygodohmyg od...

KN: No! This can't be happening! I'm too important! I'm, I'm... I'm a celebrity - get me out of here!

Panel: HA HA HA!

*BOING BOING BOING!*




« Last Edit: January 11, 2020, 10:50:54 am by fka »


  • Savant
  • The Legend

    • 2719

    • April 07, 2012, 11:35:31 pm
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11222 on: January 11, 2020, 10:40:30 am »
imagine that every single day in the uk, there was a tv program (or programs) dedicated to watching people eat fish and chips. and every single episode, the "cast" and audience acted like it's the first time they've ever seen fish and chips, and that it's the most delicious thing they've ever eaten. every single day. and people actually tune in specifically to watch it.
I dunno, imagine if back home there were the same comedy shows endlessly mocking the President while the audience laughs and thinks its getting something done instead of them, I don't know actually doing something about it instead of laughing and having repeated candlelight vigils weekend after weekend to protest them eventually leading to their ouster.

You ever stop to think that their "mindless" noodle shows and lack of "sophisticated" political comedy shows are why they were actually able to get off their asses and make a real change instead of tweeting clips of Colbert and applauding themselves for how smart they are?

So, your logic is: Korean TV shows are so awful that protesting is the only alternative?

Perhaps, I should hold a candlelight vigil to protest against Chef Baek and Yu Jae-seok being on every crappy TV show.


  • stoat
  • The Legend

    • 2085

    • March 05, 2019, 06:36:13 pm
    • seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11223 on: January 11, 2020, 11:21:40 am »
imagine that every single day in the uk, there was a tv program (or programs) dedicated to watching people eat fish and chips. and every single episode, the "cast" and audience acted like it's the first time they've ever seen fish and chips, and that it's the most delicious thing they've ever eaten. every single day. and people actually tune in specifically to watch it.
I dunno, imagine if back home there were the same comedy shows endlessly mocking the President while the audience laughs and thinks its getting something done instead of them, I don't know actually doing something about it instead of laughing and having repeated candlelight vigils weekend after weekend to protest them eventually leading to their ouster.

You ever stop to think that their "mindless" noodle shows and lack of "sophisticated" political comedy shows are why they were actually able to get off their asses and make a real change instead of tweeting clips of Colbert and applauding themselves for how smart they are?

What are you tossing on about? The US is a democracy, if people want to get rid of Trump they can vote him out. And what on earth is the link between crappy TV shows about food and political activism.

I do agree though that f-ck Trump comedy shows are usually about as entertaining as noodle slurping
« Last Edit: January 11, 2020, 11:28:47 am by stoat »


  • oglop
  • The Legend

    • 4621

    • August 25, 2011, 07:24:54 pm
    • Seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11224 on: January 11, 2020, 11:33:45 am »
imagine that every single day in the uk, there was a tv program (or programs) dedicated to watching people eat fish and chips. and every single episode, the "cast" and audience acted like it's the first time they've ever seen fish and chips, and that it's the most delicious thing they've ever eaten. every single day. and people actually tune in specifically to watch it.
I dunno, imagine if back home there were the same comedy shows endlessly mocking the President while the audience laughs and thinks its getting something done instead of them, I don't know actually doing something about it instead of laughing and having repeated candlelight vigils weekend after weekend to protest them eventually leading to their ouster.

You ever stop to think that their "mindless" noodle shows and lack of "sophisticated" political comedy shows are why they were actually able to get off their asses and make a real change instead of tweeting clips of Colbert and applauding themselves for how smart they are?
you're doing it again.

i'm talking about the crappy, repetitive tv in korea and you're talking about politics for some reason. i'm not american so i have no idea what colburt is anyway


  • Lazio
  • Expert Waygook

    • 676

    • January 27, 2018, 03:56:10 pm
    • Gyeongi-do
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11225 on: January 11, 2020, 11:41:04 am »
How come you guys don't follow DM's flawless logic?
Korean noodle slurping television is actually great. It must be great since they were able to impeach their president with months long candlelight protests.
How can you not see the connection? It's clear as daylight.


  • CO2
  • Waygook Lord

    • 7286

    • March 02, 2015, 03:41:14 pm
    • Uiwang
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11226 on: January 11, 2020, 11:45:44 am »


  • oglop
  • The Legend

    • 4621

    • August 25, 2011, 07:24:54 pm
    • Seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11227 on: January 11, 2020, 12:12:27 pm »


  • CO2
  • Waygook Lord

    • 7286

    • March 02, 2015, 03:41:14 pm
    • Uiwang
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11228 on: January 11, 2020, 12:17:10 pm »


  • stoat
  • The Legend

    • 2085

    • March 05, 2019, 06:36:13 pm
    • seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11229 on: January 11, 2020, 12:19:29 pm »
imagine that every single day in the uk, there was a tv program (or programs) dedicated to watching people eat fish and chips. and every single episode, the "cast" and audience acted like it's the first time they've ever seen fish and chips, and that it's the most delicious thing they've ever eaten. every single day. and people actually tune in specifically to watch it.
I dunno, imagine if back home there were the same comedy shows endlessly mocking the President while the audience laughs and thinks its getting something done instead of them, I don't know actually doing something about it instead of laughing and having repeated candlelight vigils weekend after weekend to protest them eventually leading to their ouster.

You ever stop to think that their "mindless" noodle shows and lack of "sophisticated" political comedy shows are why they were actually able to get off their asses and make a real change instead of tweeting clips of Colbert and applauding themselves for how smart they are?
you're doing it again.

i'm talking about the crappy, repetitive tv in korea and you're talking about politics for some reason. i'm not american so i have no idea what colburt is anyway

Stephen Colbert is the guy who mocked Bernie Sanders for saying this

"
We have got to look at candidates not by the color of their skin, not by their sexual orientation or gender and not by their age. I think we have got to try to move us toward a nondiscriminatory society that looks at people based on their abilities, based on what they stand for."

So you can see where he is politically


  • oglop
  • The Legend

    • 4621

    • August 25, 2011, 07:24:54 pm
    • Seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11230 on: January 11, 2020, 12:20:15 pm »
MODS BAN HIM. that's gotta break at least one rule. if not, let's make a new rule so this never gets posted again


  • CO2
  • Waygook Lord

    • 7286

    • March 02, 2015, 03:41:14 pm
    • Uiwang
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11231 on: January 11, 2020, 12:21:44 pm »
MODS BAN HIM. that's gotta break at least one rule. if not, let's make a new rule so this never gets posted again
+1


  • fka
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1091

    • September 05, 2019, 06:37:44 pm
    • Seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11232 on: January 11, 2020, 02:50:27 pm »
Guys, a late night talk show host has a team of writers, sitting in a room and working to a tight deadline. The hosts probably don't even see their monologues until an hour before the cameras start rolling. The writing team has to reference whoever is in the news that day, and the nature of collective joke creation with a looming deadline makes for some terrible flops.

Sadly, we weren't all born with the singular comedic gifts of the "Too Spicy" guy from Korean television.


Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11233 on: January 11, 2020, 03:29:30 pm »
4th time I've shared this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_wv8hNCYK0&

holy shit.  watched for about 13 seconds and almost had a stroke from the blood pressure spike.  Koreans watch this shit?   this is  should be used a guatanamo to torture suspected terrorist.  I'd choose water boarding.

edit ho lee chit...   over 1 million views on youtube.  fuk this ghey earth


  • Savant
  • The Legend

    • 2719

    • April 07, 2012, 11:35:31 pm
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11234 on: January 11, 2020, 06:36:58 pm »
Saturday night TV that the wife is watching: "Yoo Jae-seok cooks ramyeon for lots of people." Oh look, a grown man can crack an egg into a bowl.

Be like Ricky Gervais been filmed making beans on toast. "Oh no, he's burned the bread."


  • stoat
  • The Legend

    • 2085

    • March 05, 2019, 06:36:13 pm
    • seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11235 on: January 11, 2020, 06:42:02 pm »
It's funny because if you ever do a lesson on table manners (I've done a few for students going to the UK) Koreans always swear blind that in Korean culture it's also bad manners to
1) eat with your mouth open
2) make a noise when you're eating
3) Talk with your mouth full. 


  • Cohort 2019
  • Expert Waygook

    • 554

    • August 17, 2019, 08:09:23 pm
    • 90S.- 0'E
    more
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11236 on: January 12, 2020, 03:16:50 am »
Wow, Sam's gotten ttungttunghae!  ;D
incumbo studiis


  • VanIslander
  • Moderator LVL 1

    • 2679

    • June 02, 2011, 10:12:19 am
    • Seogwipo, Jeju Island
    more
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11237 on: January 12, 2020, 07:04:13 am »
The sounds of eating?

ASMR 101.

That's so 2018.


  • Datasapien
  • Expert Waygook

    • 565

    • February 04, 2012, 09:36:25 pm
    • Chungcheongbuk-do
    more
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11238 on: January 20, 2020, 09:32:00 am »
Everytime I've checked the air quality in the UK, London is almost always green (there have been a few yellow patches in London here and there, but even then London is mostly green). Meanwhile in Korea, if it's yellow it's considered good  :cry:

Actually London is looking almost Korean today https://aqicn.org/city/london/
I never finish anyth


  • sbk
  • Veteran

    • 130

    • March 22, 2016, 02:44:47 pm
    • seoul
Re: RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD 3.0
« Reply #11239 on: January 22, 2020, 02:22:37 pm »
I thought toilets were supposed to contain the flush water with some room left over.  I am in the public library here and i flush the toilet before using just to check it works and get rid of some toilet paper that was in the toilet. Everything looked pretty normal. The water level was normal. The toilet ended up being blocked and the dirty water overflowed quite a lot all over the floor. It really overflowed for quite a while. I didn't really hang around to find out exactly how long. I guess when you walk in and see a wet floor with wet footprints everywhere it's a sign that something is wrong. 

Actually i went up and down all 5 floors to find an available toilet and it turned out to be blocked. Busy library.