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  • stemarty
  • Featured Contributor

    • 1135

    • September 02, 2011, 12:20:42 pm
    • Jeonnamdo
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #700 on: July 01, 2013, 03:15:26 pm »
a student kneels down at my desk:

"teacher. I am shamed. I tried to steal yellow nail polish for you but my sister caught me and she beat me."


  • maykat
  • Explorer

    • 5

    • April 03, 2013, 02:15:15 pm
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #701 on: July 04, 2013, 12:46:06 pm »
Student (pointing to friend): Teacher, he is African American rapper.
Friend: Teacher, he is no panty.


  • Der Lehrer
  • Adventurer

    • 56

    • July 01, 2011, 12:38:48 pm
    • Seoul,Korea
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #702 on: July 04, 2013, 03:15:22 pm »
Every morning before we start, I ask the question..."how do you feel today?"
The other students must then share their feelings, while the rest of the class ask "why do you feel________?" This particular one went like this.

Me: How do you feel today?
Student: I feel happy today
All other students: Why do you feel happy today?
Student: I feel happy, because I am sober (looking very serious)

I will always remember this one!!!!




  • salsil2011
  • Waygookin

    • 13

    • March 05, 2013, 11:50:13 am
    • Yangju, South Korea
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #703 on: September 09, 2013, 01:24:40 pm »
(In a robotic voice, similar to the one they use in the listening tests) "Hello, Nathalie! What is your name?"

"Teacher, are you married? If not, don't worry. Every Jack has his Jill" Hahahaha ;D

Aww that's so sweet!


  • salsil2011
  • Waygookin

    • 13

    • March 05, 2013, 11:50:13 am
    • Yangju, South Korea
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #704 on: September 09, 2013, 01:29:40 pm »
I wasn't really involved in this stream of consciousness yelled out by alternating students in my 5th grade elementary class, but it started when I walked in with a little bag of candy for a game I was going to play.

Random Student 1 "Teacher! Gimmie present!"
Random Student 2 "Gimmie present!!
Random Student 3 "Gimmie president!"
Random Student 4, thoughtfully; "George Bush was a good president."
Random Student 5, aghast; "No he wasn't!  I like Obama."


Hahaha!  O man...I want to have your students.

Lmao! Me too!


  • Chicagohotdog
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1052

    • March 04, 2012, 12:25:31 pm
    • Gyeongsangbuk-do
    more
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #705 on: September 09, 2013, 03:06:18 pm »
So, with the hot weather all summer my hair has been up in a bun or pony for the last few months.  It would seem that my kids have forgotten just how long my hair is.  I walked in to class today, with my hair down and a students points at me and screams:

"Teacher!  Ghost hair!"

Because apparently I look like one of those long-haired ghosts from an Asian horror movie.

So I shoved all of my hair to cover my face and started walking around the room like a zombie and made them scream.  It was good fun actually.
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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #706 on: September 10, 2013, 07:46:23 am »
Practicing the expression "...do more harm than good." Here's a sentence one student came up with:

"Having time with girl can do more harm than good, because too much protein release makes us tired."

Another student wrote, "length of penis," but failed to provide a reason for why it can do more harm than good.


  • stemarty
  • Featured Contributor

    • 1135

    • September 02, 2011, 12:20:42 pm
    • Jeonnamdo
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #707 on: September 10, 2013, 07:51:24 am »

"Having time with girl can do more harm than good, because too much protein release makes us tired."


brilliant


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #708 on: September 10, 2013, 09:32:32 am »
A group of students approached me nervously in the teacher's office (I've only been teaching at this school a week). After conferring in Korean one of them positively shouted: "Teacher! You so sexy!"I thought my co-teacher would die laughing. Another time, my class of first grade middle schoolers wanted to see a picture of me with long hair (They are very curious about my short red hair). Obligingly, I dug up a photo of myself in 8th grade, thinking they would like to see what I looked like in middle school. For a moment, they were stunned by my abundance of frizzy brown hair. And then one of my students shouted "Teacher, you like in Princess Diary, BEFORE change-y to pretty!"


  • adfletch83
  • Super Waygook

    • 297

    • June 02, 2012, 11:01:40 pm
    • Daegu, ROK
    more
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #709 on: September 10, 2013, 09:41:54 am »
I was doing a class on 'loanwords' (taken from here and edited) last week with 3rd grade middle school. We went though loanwords and I asked what problems North Korean defectors would have in South Korea. Then the next slide asked "Why is North Korean language different from South Korean?"

Just as I'd finished asking the question aloud, a girl shouts out at the top of her voice "long time no see!". We laughed for a solid 2 mins!
Have a nice Daegu!!


  • Wintermute
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1196

    • October 06, 2011, 01:07:27 pm
    • MURRICA!!!
    more
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #710 on: September 10, 2013, 12:44:40 pm »
MR. WINTER TEACHU

ENGLISH LANGUAGY IS CELL PHONE OKAY!?!?!

KOREAN LANGUAGY IS SMART PHONE OKAY??!!?

i explained we call them smart phones in america.

OSH CHI CHA, SMART PHONE IS KOREAN WORD TEACHU.

(in fact I think it was america or UK that started the whole smart thing, i remember smart boards in class when i was a little kid and we played Oregon trail on em)


  • wgarms11
  • Newgookin

    • 2

    • June 01, 2013, 07:42:32 am
    • Pyeongtaek-Si, South Korea
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #711 on: September 10, 2013, 12:59:06 pm »
Just had a student come up to me and try to give me a q-tip. Not really sure if it was used or not.  He speaks zero English but I told him "Oh, thank you, I don't want that." He then explains to me (in Korean) and pantomimes the proper procedure for cleaning one's ear with q-tips. So I just point to the trashcan. He puts it back in his pocket and says "Okay Teacher!!" and leaves.


Maybe my ears are dirty!?!? :huh: :huh:


  • borlan1
  • Newgookin

    • 3

    • November 20, 2012, 03:37:38 pm
    • South Korea
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #712 on: September 10, 2013, 01:08:39 pm »
I got a sunburn from being on the beach without using sunscreen.  The students kept asking me if I had been drinking soju because my face was so red.  They also kept making a one shot motion.


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #713 on: September 10, 2013, 01:34:10 pm »
This isn't a student, but a superior co-worker of mine who tries really hard to learn English (I'm supposing just for the sake of knowing; he only uses it with the two native teachers here). Anyway, our conversation through messenger:

Co-Worker: "Hello! Did you have a nice lunch? Can you tell me what POOPS is?"
Me: (..........................uh) "I'm not sure. What is the context?"
Co-Worker: "If you have time, can you come to the office?"
Me:  :huh:

Actually on topic, almost none of my students have mastered the difference between "Could you do me a favor?" and "Could you do me?"
But I'm not a marine biologist....


  • 한소로
  • Expert Waygook

    • 783

    • March 20, 2012, 07:50:46 am
    more
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #714 on: September 10, 2013, 01:42:43 pm »
Written in one kid's notebook:

"I want to be: a laptop."

"I want to: tiger."


  • Mezoti97
  • The Legend

    • 2666

    • April 14, 2011, 03:02:50 pm
    • South Korea
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #715 on: September 10, 2013, 02:07:55 pm »
Written in one kid's notebook:

"I want to be: a laptop."

"I want to: tiger."

Not really the same, but this reminds me of two different things I witnessed students had written down on two separate occasions (one a couple of years ago at a previous school, the other last winter).

A couple of years ago, my then-6th grade students were doing a fill-in-the-blank worksheet where they had to fill in the missing verbs in different sentences, which were provided in a word bank on the worksheet. Anyhow, two of the sentences were, "I ___ my bike" and "I ___ my grandmother," the answers for which were "ride" and "visit." One kid whose English level was low wrote "ride" for the sentence, "I ___ my grandmother." What an awkward sentence to read...

Last winter, the students who visited the English Center in my town apparently did an activity where they wrote letters to Santa Claus in English asking him for the present that they wanted to get for Christmas. The letters were hanging up on the wall all around the classroom, and I noticed many of the students had written, "Dear Santa, I want to smartphone." Haha.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2013, 03:16:50 pm by Mezoti97 »


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #716 on: September 10, 2013, 02:10:55 pm »
Teacher! She cannot work.
Why not?
Teacher! She is sick.
What is wrong?
She have... She heart... She heart have problem?
What's wrong with her heart?
Teacher! It broke!
It broke?
Boyprend broke!


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #717 on: September 10, 2013, 02:11:41 pm »
Group of students followed two students into the office...

Me: "Why are you following them into the office?"
Student: "We want to see."
Me: "See what?"
Student: "They are in trouble."
Me: "Why?"
Student: "They are stupid."


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #718 on: September 10, 2013, 03:25:33 pm »
I may have just read through this entire thread...

My favourite experiences so far:

The grade 4 girl who motioned to her nose, then mimed it being far larger, then pointed to my nose, and said, "WHY?" She sounded so affronted...

The grade 6 boy who showed me his folder yesterday. It had "Big Bang" and "G Dragon" scrawled all over it.
Boy: Teacher, you love them.
Me: Yes, I'm a fan.
Boy: You love. So I love now too.

And, perhaps the best:
Co-teacher: Why do you like Sarah Teacher?
Boy (in Korean): She smiles!
Girl (in English): Other English teacher smiled, but he man. Sarah teacher woman.
Boy (in English): Much better.
(All students nod very seriously.)


  • Fanwarrior
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1081

    • June 06, 2011, 09:19:35 pm
    • Seoul, South Korea
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #719 on: September 10, 2013, 03:50:54 pm »
Quote
One kid whose English level was low wrote "ride" for the sentence, "I ___ my grandmother." What an awkward sentence to read...
Why? I see lots of grandparents giving piggyback rides to their grandchildren.