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  • Jeff619
  • Expert Waygook

    • 817

    • May 26, 2011, 08:12:52 am
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #500 on: July 20, 2012, 01:02:05 pm »
Contrite first grade middle schooler approaches me for the rubber band I confiscated at the start of class: [sad face] Teacha, I can have rubber?
I was asking a student what he wanted for his birthday.  He smiled and said "I want condom!"  Turns out 'condom' is Korean for some kind of model or something.


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #501 on: July 20, 2012, 01:24:08 pm »
A lot of my students, especially the girls, really like me... some maybe too much.

"Teacher, I love you... I want to make babies with you."

She's freaking in 2nd year high school, too... which is.. what? 16 western age? So I'm sure she knew what she wanted to say.

I couldn't do anything but just laugh.

I'm a girl and this happens to me all the time at my middle school. The other day some of the girls came into the office and one said "I love you. We are girlfriends" and the other girl said "Ok then I am teachers boyfriend' and the first girl said "NO TEACHER CAN LOVE ME, NO ONE ELSE BUT ME! I AM BOTH BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND! SHE ONLY LOVES ME AND I WILL BE WITH HER FOREVER!! STAY AWAY!" *screams until other student leaves*

and now I can sympathise with my male friends who have clingy mental girlfriends  ???


  • The.it.girl
  • Veteran

    • 123

    • November 11, 2010, 07:15:27 pm
    • Chungnam, Korea
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #502 on: July 20, 2012, 01:52:29 pm »
I teach at a high school, so last week after the exams I showed the students a movie, One of my 1st grade boys, asks me what the genre of the movie is, I tell him its a romantic comedy, he asks me "Teacher can I go borrow a girlfriend nextdoor" My responce is obviously a NO.. He then comes to the front of his class with his chair puts it down next to me and says: " Well then Teacher today you are my girlfriend??!! OKAY!!!!" ;)


  • SMOE NSET
  • Adventurer

    • 55

    • September 09, 2010, 01:21:21 pm
    • Seoul
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #503 on: July 20, 2012, 02:38:35 pm »

I was asking a student what he wanted for his birthday.  He smiled and said "I want condom!"  Turns out 'condom' is Korean for some kind of model or something.

It's Gundam and the models are from an anime from Japan. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gundam_Model

There are computers in the English classroom and last year my co-teacher started screaming at some 6th grade boys using them. I asked why and she said they were looking at gay cartoons (not sure what that means or what they entail). One boy said he liked watching erotic movies (pronounced "arrow" in Korean) every day. This is at an elementary school. Needless to say but the computers haven't been turned on since. Glad those boys are gone.


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #504 on: July 20, 2012, 02:38:35 pm »
Contrite first grade middle schooler approaches me for the rubber band I confiscated at the start of class: [sad face] Teacha, I can have rubber?
I was asking a student what he wanted for his birthday.  He smiled and said "I want condom!"  Turns out 'condom' is Korean for some kind of model or something.
I just realized that he was saying, "Gundam" - sorry if you already figured that out, but I'm just now reading over this thread.

Earlier today one of my students was sweeping my room and he started singing "Fantastic Chicken" to the tune of "Fantastic Baby". I loved it.
"WOW. ... Fantastic Chicken"


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #505 on: July 20, 2012, 04:38:31 pm »
Fantastic chicken is actually a joke cover some Koreans did of the song.  My students sing it all the time


  • bawaugh
  • Super Waygook

    • 497

    • March 04, 2012, 08:49:30 pm
    • Geoje
    more
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #506 on: July 20, 2012, 05:00:33 pm »
Me: you spent 4 years in china.

4th grade student - how did you know?

Me: You told me.
PV=nRT

Where
P is pressure
V is volume
n is number of moles
R is the gas constant
T is the temperature


  • stemarty
  • Featured Contributor

    • 1135

    • September 02, 2011, 12:20:42 pm
    • Jeonnamdo
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #507 on: July 21, 2012, 04:02:14 pm »
Student: Teacher, what do you think of *****?
Me: ....???!! *****?
Student: Yes yes, ***** pussssssshhhiiiieeeeee
Me: Um I don't really think ....wait. Say that one more time?...... Bushy?
Student: Yes! Yes!! George Bushy!!


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #508 on: July 22, 2012, 12:22:33 am »
Student: Teacher, what do you think of *****?
Me: ....???!! *****?
Student: Yes yes, ***** pussssssshhhiiiieeeeee
Me: Um I don't really think ....wait. Say that one more time?...... Bushy?
Student: Yes! Yes!! George Bushy!!
nice.


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #509 on: July 23, 2012, 07:51:01 am »
When taking a quick walk around the school to stretch my legs after an afternoon of lesson planning :

Student: "Teacher, what are you doing?"
Me: "Just taking a walk."
Student: "But why teacher, you're not fat?"

 


  • Chicagohotdog
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1052

    • March 04, 2012, 12:25:31 pm
    • Gyeongsangbuk-do
    more
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #510 on: July 23, 2012, 10:12:59 am »
OP - if your students can actually speak like that I am impressed.  I can't get my high schoolers to talk that well, let alone my middle schoolers. 
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$10 off of a Tour booked through Viator.com (You get $10 off and I'll get $10 off - that could be an airport ride): https://www.viator.com/raf/PDPOTBSYI

http://travelhacking.org/sammery-wants-you


  • stemarty
  • Featured Contributor

    • 1135

    • September 02, 2011, 12:20:42 pm
    • Jeonnamdo
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #511 on: July 23, 2012, 11:16:46 am »
When taking a quick walk around the school to stretch my legs after an afternoon of lesson planning :

Student: "Teacher, what are you doing?"
Me: "Just taking a walk."
Student: "But why teacher, you're not fat?"

I once went hiking with my co-teacher (I really am not much of a hiker but I still do it to please my teachers) and after we climbed like 600 stairs up a mountain we took a rest at a picnic area.

the P.E. teacher looked at me and said: Hey...You....Good...Stairmaster.... really fast....why? ...... no need...... no need for you...you slimmer now than last year.


  • padme
  • Adventurer

    • 31

    • July 21, 2012, 06:59:13 pm
    • Gyeonggi
Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #512 on: July 25, 2012, 01:20:34 am »
(In a robotic voice, similar to the one they use in the listening tests) "Hello, Nathalie! What is your name?"

"Teacher, are you married? If not, don't worry. Every Jack has his Jill" Hahahaha ;D
« Last Edit: July 25, 2012, 01:23:20 am by padme »


Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #513 on: July 26, 2012, 10:17:58 am »
my own blog for recording these things:

http://eslfunnies.blogspot.com


  • ehmaeearwhy
  • Adventurer

    • 27

    • October 14, 2011, 08:34:44 am
    • giheung-gu, yongin-si, gyeonggi-do
Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #514 on: August 22, 2012, 08:40:20 am »
I was doing an assignment where the kids were allowed to get a little loud, but these two boys in the back were extra rowdy.  I gave them a stare, and when one of the boys noticed me staring he defensively pointed at the other boy and said, "Teacher, he's f***ing me!"  o_o
I wasn't sure how to respond so I was just going to ignore it, but he says another three times, "He's f***ing me!"  I finally had to call him aside and ask him if he knew what that meant. 
He said no... I'm pretty sure he meaning that the other kid was f***ing with him...
but I didn't feel like it was my place to explain that to him. 
so I just told him not to say what he did because he's saying something very bad about himself. -_-
the end.


Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #515 on: August 22, 2012, 10:20:25 am »
I had to play 20 Questions in one of my classes because we did not have the projector working and my students were picking other students in the room to describe. Well, Korean pronunciation definitely confused both me and my coteacher. The student was trying to say "Does he like insects?" Instead we heard " Does he like in sex?" Both my coteacher and I turned red and needed him to repeat himself to figure out what he was trying to say!


  • Manyisa_1
  • Adventurer

    • 57

    • November 17, 2010, 01:34:55 pm
    • Gumi
Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #516 on: August 22, 2012, 10:48:59 am »
" Does he like in sex?"

Could have been worse,I could swear  I would have heard "Does he like incest"


  • SBracken
  • Expert Waygook

    • 579

    • March 07, 2011, 07:41:22 am
    • Pohang, S Korea
Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #517 on: August 23, 2012, 07:41:11 am »
During one camp, we had a really small class; they all know each other really well and get along great- it's a small school. everybody was playing during break, in particular a boy and a girl that were beating on each other, shouting (I'm sure he made fun of her kpop-covered desk or something along those lines ;) ). One of the first grade students was just quietly hanging out near me at this point, and she looks up at me and says:
'Teacha, they are S and M!'


Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #518 on: August 24, 2012, 10:19:25 am »
For a warm up, I had my students decide what they would bring with them if they got stranded on a desert island. For a fictional character, one group said God, for items/objects, many groups said girls, and one group said a Maxim magazine and tissues...


In another class:
Me:  What is an example of something that can "do more harm than good"?
Student:  Too much masturbation.


  • stemarty
  • Featured Contributor

    • 1135

    • September 02, 2011, 12:20:42 pm
    • Jeonnamdo
Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #519 on: August 24, 2012, 01:38:57 pm »
in a grade 2 students summer vacation journal:
This camp's lunch is trash. I would rather eat bread than trash.

Shin You: Oh teacher....you me....chicken.....I take you for chicken, you give me good grade.

Me: Do you know what day it is today?
John: uh...thursday?
Me: no no. Its my birthday!
John: OH MY GOSH
Me: You forgot?! You promised me you would remember!
John: OH MY GOSH!
Me: I am sad you forgot to get me a present?
John: uhhhh...hmmm how about birthday kiss instead?