RANTING/VENTING MEGATHREAD

So I started a thread on Friday to allow us a decent fighting pit that the more pugnacious among us can go to instead of derailing other threads. Fun was had, questions were asked, arguments were put forth, tentative steps towards friendship were taken over some terrible Australian pop music. All in a good thread for dogs that like a scrap and one obvious to avoid for the sensible folk.

I returned to work full of trepidation. I had read a few articles on xojane and everdayfeminism and was ready to do battle with consenting enemies. Alternatively I could elaborate on my tales of Berber lovers. My hopes were to be brutally dashed on the rocks of censorship.

Over the weekend a moderator swooped down like a shrike and callously locked the thread down. Only one vague warning was given. What personal attacks? Many statements were attacked but that's it. The worse is the claim that the subject above had been discussed. What subject? The thread touched on feminism, racism, fictional childhoods, perceptions in Korea and many more. Also, why is it the worse crime on earth to discuss something twice?

Seriously mods, why on earth do you lock down threads for flimsy reasons. What makes you think that is your role in life? Why does unfettered discussion among adults bother you so much? Is this forum some sort of online version of the Stanford Prison Experiments? Is Arsalan trying to prove that power is inevitably abused?

Maybe the primary stakeholders in this website should have a chat as to what this site is for. If you want to make it a place simply for expat advice and teaching resources then say so and make it so. Close down the Open Discussion and the Newsroom. If you allow people a venue to express themselves then don't get huffy when they use it.

Maybe this is a sign of my age. I guess I can't shake the idea that debate and free expression are good things and censorship is bad. Do you under 30's prefer comfort to challenge? Does free speech mean little to you?

Anyways, just needed to rant.

Hey man, keep it down. You'll get my ranting thread shut down. 

Oh god: I hear foil unwrapping, and out of the corner of my eye I can see the teachers massing at the table by the sink. This means someone has brought a food item, which means I will be expected to engage in a social interaction. I am trying not to look directly in that direction, stay focused on this writing, so that people will think I am busy, but nevertheless, I know that after a few minutes, if I do not go over, a teacher, usually the Farting Teacher, will come over and say, we are having rice cakes, will you join us? And of course I can’t say no, so I will have to get up and go and stand around awkwardly while people speak in Korean. I used to like that, the way I had no way of communicating with anyone, because it meant I really didn’t have to, but now even the effort of standing there and pretending to enjoy myself is trying. Why can’t I be by myself? And of course, the Farting Teacher will say “Do you know traditional Korean rice cakes?”, the same f*cking thing he says every f*cking week we have f*cking traditional Korean rice cakes, and I just smile and nod, and he looks amazed and communicates in Korean my knowledge of rice cakes to the other teachers, and they look amazed, and I have to stand there while they stare at me and pretend to enjoy this sticky flavourless mass the consistency of thickened spooge.

Koreans aren't loud and they NEVER yell down hallways in buildings so poorly insulated they have the acoustics of a tile bathroom and i certainly didn't have to go yell at a neighbor and police officer at 3am. It's good to be a foreigner when your presence plus a small amount of targeted Korean will stun them shut.

Oh god: I hear foil unwrapping, and out of the corner of my eye I can see the teachers massing at the table by the sink. This means someone has brought a food item, which means I will be expected to engage in a social interaction. I am trying not to look directly in that direction, stay focused on this writing, so that people will think I am busy, but nevertheless, I know that after a few minutes, if I do not go over, a teacher, usually the Farting Teacher, will come over and say, we are having rice cakes, will you join us? And of course I can’t say no, so I will have to get up and go and stand around awkwardly while people speak in Korean. I used to like that, the way I had no way of communicating with anyone, because it meant I really didn’t have to, but now even the effort of standing there and pretending to enjoy myself is trying. Why can’t I be by myself? And of course, the Farting Teacher will say “Do you know traditional Korean rice cakes?”, the same f*cking thing he says every f*cking week we have f*cking traditional Korean rice cakes, and I just smile and nod, and he looks amazed and communicates in Korean my knowledge of rice cakes to the other teachers, and they look amazed, and I have to stand there while they stare at me and pretend to enjoy this sticky flavourless mass the consistency of thickened spooge.

I can't tell you the immense joy I have when I tell people 'No, thank you, I don't like kimchi/rice cakes/bibimbap/Paris Baguette/Tous Le Jours or your sh*tty grass tea.'
After 2 years of being almost bullied into ingesting this stuff and having every Korean watching in silence and awe as I take a bite/sip and feign approval, like I'm some kind of circus act, I reached breaking point.

After the initial shock and 'Oh, it must be too spicy for you.' 'No, I just don't like it.'
No pretences, just 'No, I don't like it.'

They've stopped offering and talk amongst themselves, in Korean, of how I don't like rice cakes... It's pathetic, because as you've said, a large amount of Koreans don't like it either, they just smile and accept it. Odds are, at least 2 of them in the group don't like it either, but will continue to prattle on how they can't understand how I don't like it... utterly pathetic.
I go to 5 schools a week, so if things get too awkward (for them at least, I've stopped caring) I just go to the next school and don't see them till next week.

These days, I feel a bit like the protagonist in the the final scene of 'Office Space'... F*ckin' A!

Do headphones exist in Korea? Would they make an appropriate Chuseok gift for the teacher in my office that insists on blasting out whatever obnoxiously loud tripe she can find on the internet that day from her computer speakers in the office?

Was just in class teaching a lesson about opinions. The first thing that I taught to them that there is no right or wrong answer, that it is important to be able to have a reason for believeing what you do and that it is important to respect other people's opinions....here is what followed:

One student asks me about Dokdo, I reply that I don't have an opinion on the matter. Before long, all of the students are up in arms insisting that Dokdo does indeed belong to Korea. I again state that I don't have an opinion on the matter. Students keep insisting that it is Korea's island. I ask them why.....their answer: because it belongs to Korea. (note I really have no opinion on the matter but found it strange that there wasn't anyone that could explain to me why it belongs to Korea.)

I then say that I think it is strange to eat live octopus...as expected, the majority of students insisted that it was indeed delicious and that it was not strange in the slightest way. I ask them if they thought eating Rocky Mountain oysters (cow testicles) was strange, as that would be more common than eating live octopus where I come from. The students and teachers say that it is gross and insist that it is completely weird to even think of eating them. I then ask them if any of them have ever tried it and of course nobody has, but they still insist that it is disgusting and strange.

So much for trying to teach a lesson in Korea about having an opinion and respecting that other people may have differing opinions. Oh Korea......

Oh god: I hear foil unwrapping, and out of the corner of my eye I can see the teachers massing at the table by the sink. This means someone has brought a food item, which means I will be expected to engage in a social interaction. I am trying not to look directly in that direction, stay focused on this writing, so that people will think I am busy, but nevertheless, I know that after a few minutes, if I do not go over, a teacher, usually the Farting Teacher, will come over and say, we are having rice cakes, will you join us? And of course I can’t say no, so I will have to get up and go and stand around awkwardly while people speak in Korean. I used to like that, the way I had no way of communicating with anyone, because it meant I really didn’t have to, but now even the effort of standing there and pretending to enjoy myself is trying. Why can’t I be by myself? And of course, the Farting Teacher will say “Do you know traditional Korean rice cakes?”, the same f*cking thing he says every f*cking week we have f*cking traditional Korean rice cakes, and I just smile and nod, and he looks amazed and communicates in Korean my knowledge of rice cakes to the other teachers, and they look amazed, and I have to stand there while they stare at me and pretend to enjoy this sticky flavourless mass the consistency of thickened spooge.

I can't tell you the immense joy I have when I tell people 'No, thank you, I don't like kimchi/rice cakes/bibimbap/Paris Baguette/Tous Le Jours or your sh*tty grass tea.'
After 2 years of being almost bullied into ingesting this stuff and having every Korean watching in silence and awe as I take a bite/sip and feign approval, like I'm some kind of circus act, I reached breaking point.

After the initial shock and 'Oh, it must be too spicy for you.' 'No, I just don't like it.'
No pretences, just 'No, I don't like it.'

They've stopped offering and talk amongst themselves, in Korean, of how I don't like rice cakes... It's pathetic, because as you've said, a large amount of Koreans don't like it either, they just smile and accept it. Odds are, at least 2 of them in the group don't like it either, but will continue to prattle on how they can't understand how I don't like it... utterly pathetic.
I go to 5 schools a week, so if things get too awkward (for them at least, I've stopped caring) I just go to the next school and don't see them till next week.

These days, I feel a bit like the protagonist in the the final scene of 'Office Space'... F*ckin' A!

The trick is to get a reputation as a food expert and snob. I've lived in several world famous gastronomical cities and I made sure my colleagues know it. I am also vocal about what (for them) highly elaborate dish I am going to prepare later. I even once roped a co-teacher to help me score some bavette at a local butcher of good repute. I bring homemade goodies that might as well be sorcery to them

Now they know better than to invite me for anything else than fruit. I have tried everything they have offered and always wondered out loud what I could do to make it decent. If you are given a soup, mention a vegetable that would make it good. If it's a fermented dish say that it would make a great ingredient for something. Never, ever say that something is delicious even if it is. My greatest triumph a few years ago was taking over the pork belly grill, scavenging for flavorings around the table and making the food taste....well, of something. They were astonished that this was possible.

I have now reached the point where they are  mildly embarrassed at the food on offer at dinners. And rightly so. They know not to invite me to drink anywhere that doesn't serve foreign booze.

It's all about the long game. Koreans, like dogs and seals, respond well to consistent behavioral modification.

Was just in class teaching a lesson about opinions. The first thing that I taught to them that there is no right or wrong answer, that it is important to be able to have a reason for believeing what you do and that it is important to respect other people's opinions....here is what followed:

One student asks me about Dokdo, I reply that I don't have an opinion on the matter. Before long, all of the students are up in arms insisting that Dokdo does indeed belong to Korea. I again state that I don't have an opinion on the matter. Students keep insisting that it is Korea's island. I ask them why.....their answer: because it belongs to Korea. (note I really have no opinion on the matter but found it strange that there wasn't anyone that could explain to me why it belongs to Korea.)

I then say that I think it is strange to eat live octopus...as expected, the majority of students insisted that it was indeed delicious and that it was not strange in the slightest way. I ask them if they thought eating Rocky Mountain oysters (cow testicles) was strange, as that would be more common than eating live octopus where I come from. The students and teachers say that it is gross and insist that it is completely weird to even think of eating them. I then ask them if any of them have ever tried it and of course nobody has, but they still insist that it is disgusting and strange.

So much for trying to teach a lesson in Korea about having an opinion and respecting that other people may have differing opinions. Oh Korea......

Did you help them develop reasons for why they believe what they believe? Or did you just keep asking them why? They need help with that.

Your lesson and the Dokdo thing seem like a good opportunity to outline the different opinions and show what the reasons are for each opinion. From that point, you can show the students that there are better answers to "Why?" than just "Dokdo is Korean."

I mean... they're kids. Of course they're bad at this stuff. I think next time don't say you have no opinion. Say my opinion doesn't matter, but here's the sides and reasons I've heard. Then let the students know if they want to participate and have an opinion, they should be equally able to list reasons. It'll take time.

Oh god: I hear foil unwrapping, and out of the corner of my eye I can see the teachers massing at the table by the sink. This means someone has brought a food item, which means I will be expected to engage in a social interaction. I am trying not to look directly in that direction, stay focused on this writing, so that people will think I am busy, but nevertheless, I know that after a few minutes, if I do not go over, a teacher, usually the Farting Teacher, will come over and say, we are having rice cakes, will you join us? And of course I can’t say no, so I will have to get up and go and stand around awkwardly while people speak in Korean. I used to like that, the way I had no way of communicating with anyone, because it meant I really didn’t have to, but now even the effort of standing there and pretending to enjoy myself is trying. Why can’t I be by myself? And of course, the Farting Teacher will say “Do you know traditional Korean rice cakes?”, the same f*cking thing he says every f*cking week we have f*cking traditional Korean rice cakes, and I just smile and nod, and he looks amazed and communicates in Korean my knowledge of rice cakes to the other teachers, and they look amazed, and I have to stand there while they stare at me and pretend to enjoy this sticky flavourless mass the consistency of thickened spooge.

I can't tell you the immense joy I have when I tell people 'No, thank you, I don't like kimchi/rice cakes/bibimbap/Paris Baguette/Tous Le Jours or your sh*tty grass tea.'
After 2 years of being almost bullied into ingesting this stuff and having every Korean watching in silence and awe as I take a bite/sip and feign approval, like I'm some kind of circus act, I reached breaking point.

After the initial shock and 'Oh, it must be too spicy for you.' 'No, I just don't like it.'
No pretences, just 'No, I don't like it.'

They've stopped offering and talk amongst themselves, in Korean, of how I don't like rice cakes... It's pathetic, because as you've said, a large amount of Koreans don't like it either, they just smile and accept it. Odds are, at least 2 of them in the group don't like it either, but will continue to prattle on how they can't understand how I don't like it... utterly pathetic.
I go to 5 schools a week, so if things get too awkward (for them at least, I've stopped caring) I just go to the next school and don't see them till next week.

These days, I feel a bit like the protagonist in the the final scene of 'Office Space'... F*ckin' A!

The trick is to get a reputation as a food expert and snob. I've lived in several world famous gastronomical cities and I made sure my colleagues know it. I am also vocal about what (for them) highly elaborate dish I am going to prepare later. I even once roped a co-teacher to help me score some bavette at a local butcher of good repute. I bring homemade goodies that might as well be sorcery to them

Now they know better than to invite me for anything else than fruit. I have tried everything they have offered and always wondered out loud what I could do to make it decent. If you are given a soup, mention a vegetable that would make it good. If it's a fermented dish say that it would make a great ingredient for something. Never, ever say that something is delicious even if it is. My greatest triumph a few years ago was taking over the pork belly grill, scavenging for flavorings around the table and making the food taste....well, of something. They were astonished that this was possible.

I have now reached the point where they are  mildly embarrassed at the food on offer at dinners. And rightly so. They know not to invite me to drink anywhere that doesn't serve foreign booze.

It's all about the long game. Koreans, like dogs and seals, respond well to consistent behavioral modification.

I didn't even look at who wrote this and I told myself, "This has to be englishrose."

Your lesson and the Dokdo thing seem like a good opportunity to outline the different opinions and show what the reasons are for each opinion.

I didn't even look at who wrote this and I told myself, "This has to be atemporaryaccount."

Did you help them develop reasons for why they believe what they believe? Or did you just keep asking them why? They need help with that.

Your lesson and the Dokdo thing seem like a good opportunity to outline the different opinions and show what the reasons are for each opinion. From that point, you can show the students that there are better answers to "Why?" than just "Dokdo is Korean."

I mean... they're kids. Of course they're bad at this stuff. I think next time don't say you have no opinion. Say my opinion doesn't matter, but here's the sides and reasons I've heard. Then let the students know if they want to participate and have an opinion, they should be equally able to list reasons. It'll take time.

Of course the goal of the lesson was in aiding the students in coming up with reasons they may have an opinion one way or the other. At the same time, I used this as a brief example in class and don't believe it is within my authority to be giving my opinion on the matter or helping the students come up with reasons for their opinions as to why it belongs to Korea.

The aim of me bringing up Dokdo was to show them how saying you have no opinion on the matter is in some instances better than giving an opinion that may offend (intended or not) many people. For example, if there were both Koreans and Japanese people present then there is nothing you could really say without offending one of them. So it would be a better idea to simply say you had no opinion in that situation.....the students wouldn't really accept this and kept pushing their opinion.

Did you help them develop reasons for why they believe what they believe? Or did you just keep asking them why? They need help with that.

Your lesson and the Dokdo thing seem like a good opportunity to outline the different opinions and show what the reasons are for each opinion. From that point, you can show the students that there are better answers to "Why?" than just "Dokdo is Korean."

I mean... they're kids. Of course they're bad at this stuff. I think next time don't say you have no opinion. Say my opinion doesn't matter, but here's the sides and reasons I've heard. Then let the students know if they want to participate and have an opinion, they should be equally able to list reasons. It'll take time.

Of course the goal of the lesson was in aiding the students in coming up with reasons they may have an opinion one way or the other. At the same time, I used this as a brief example in class and don't believe it is within my authority to be giving my opinion on the matter or helping the students come up with reasons for their opinions as to why it belongs to Korea.

The aim of me bringing up Dokdo was to show them how saying you have no opinion on the matter is in some instances better than giving an opinion that may offend (intended or not) many people. For example, if there were both Koreans and Japanese people present then there is nothing you could really say without offending one of them. So it would be a better idea to simply say you had no opinion in that situation.....the students wouldn't really accept this and kept pushing their opinion.

OK, but isn't the point to show them that having and expressing an opinion is not the same as causing offense? Like, in that room, it's possible to give an opinion in a way (good reasons, calmly, respectfully) that doesn't offend the Koreans or the Japanese? That's the lesson they all should learn.

I agree, though, depending on which level you teach, it's probably not in an English classroom that they should learn this.

Ummmmm feel free to send me all of your unwanted ddeok.

Every Wednesday is recorder day.. I can handle that.

But now they've introduced a big drum. I think it for the end of year ceremony.

Every Wednesday morning and now every afternoon.

It's like sweet music to my ears. 

This morning I ate a sweet potato accompanied by kimchi.  I don't know what's happening to me.  I don't know who I am anymore. 

This morning I ate a sweet potato accompanied by kimchi.  I don't know what's happening to me.  I don't know who I am anymore. 

Did you mention it was cold 5-10 times before you got to work today?

Yesterday I saw a kid in the elevator that lives on my floor, and the ****** nerve of this kid. He didn't say hi to me or NOTHING. Just stared and biked away. I should pop his tires for that kid of korean nonsense.

This morning I ate a sweet potato accompanied by kimchi.  I don't know what's happening to me.  I don't know who I am anymore. 

Did you mention it was cold 5-10 times before you got to work today?

Haha, it is cold today because it's raining, but it hasn't slipped out yet.  I didn't wear a jacket today though, much less a down winter one, so maybe there's still hope... 

This morning I ate a sweet potato accompanied by kimchi.  I don't know what's happening to me.  I don't know who I am anymore. 

Did you mention it was cold 5-10 times before you got to work today?

Haha. Classic.

Yesterday I saw a kid in the elevator that lives on my floor, and the ****** nerve of this kid. He didn't say hi to me or NOTHING. Just stared and biked away. I should pop his tires for that kid of korean nonsense.

When kids first see me, their eyes widen to the size of saucers and I can hear their necks creaking.  Some gasp as my shadow looms over them, smothering them as they're trapped in the confines of our claustrophobic elevator.  Some manage to squeak out a whispered "키크다..."  before the elevator reaches their floor and they can stumble backward out the door to safety. 

Returned home to find the fridge freezer defrosted.

Nothing salvageable......no t the beef, chicken, salmon or selection of Italian cheeses in the fridge.