Things Koreans do that irks us

Teacher, candy?

It's not that I find this question particularly annoying, but just hate being asked.

"Do you like Korea?"

I feel like, most of the time, Koreans are trying to trap you with this question. They ask it with the implication that you should only say GOOD things about Korea.

If you say something like, "Yeah, I enjoy it, but sometimes it's hard to live in Korea as a foreigner."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN!"

Just want to roll my eyes (here we go again....)

Yeah I'm a pretty down to Earth guy and I normally tell them it's hard for foreigners. To which they reply *that.* Then I just give them a few reasons: the racism, alienation and xenophobia- which they just don't get even after I tell them, but after that I just ignore them and drop the conversation even if they try to bring it back up. I do this every time now, pop their bubble and leave it.

My worst: Do you have four seasons in your country?
Second: Anything that starts with "Do you know, in Korea....?"

"Why don't you have a baby?"
"When are you going to have a baby?"
"Where is your baby?"
"Doesn't your husband want a baby?"
"Is there something wrong with your health? You don't have any children..."

SHUT UP.
SHUT UP.
SHUT UP.

I don't care what the sociocultural mores are here. This is a ****** rude question and I won't answer it anymore. My school's former gym teacher used to sit across from me at lunch and grill me in rapid-fire, loud Korean about why I wasn't giving my husband children. He even pointed at my stomach with his chopsticks one day and went "Balli balli!! BALLI BALLI!!!"

I just smiled and told him (through my CT) that I would have a baby as soon as he paid for a nice, big apartment.

I know it meant to be caring or whatever. I don't care. I've been at my school for a year and a half and they are still asking me about it every goddamn day. It's not like I'm approaching menopause and it's a time-sensitive issue, either.

He's an ignorant **** and he's way out of line.

I'd love him to talk to me like that. I'm just looking for a fight. But everyone steers clear of me for some reason.

I don't like questions that are framed to elicit responses that a) admit some kind of superiority of Korean culture or b) compel you to insist that you aren't entirely stupid and/or helpless.

I completely agree with your first paragraph.  I hate patronizing and loaded questions.  But your subtext assumptions are presumptuous and kind of stupid. 

"Isn't Korean too difficult for you?" (Subtext: English is a baby's language, that's why it's so popular. Not like Korean, so full of subtlety and graceful, nuanced complexity.)

Most Koreans think English is very hard.  Just ask them.  I have never met a Korean who thinks it is a "baby's language."  Many complain about English's subtleties, especially differences between varieties of English.  English is popular because the US and the UK's economic/cultural might have made it the international language, not because it is easy. 

And Korean is a difficult language for English speakers.  The US Defense Language Institute puts it in Level 4 (highest) in terms of difficultly (along with Arabic and Mandarin).  I enjoy studying it, but it is damn hard. 

"Don't you miss your family?" (Subtext: Because fo-ree-ners don't love and respect their families like we do.)

Most people miss their families if they are away for over a year; that's why they ask.  They worry that you get sad and homesick.  There is absolutely no assumption that we love our families less than they do.  This notion is simply ridiculous. 

"Why did you choose to work in another country?" (Subtext: Because yours is going down in flames in the face of the Asian juggernaut rising!)

Despite their national pride, most Koreans think our home countries sound awesome to live in.  They see our countries as being more fun, less stressful, and lacking the strict Asian social hierarchy that they hate so much (yes, they hate it just like we do).  Talk to any Korean who has studied abroad and they are usually dying to go back to Australia, Canada, New Zealand, the US, the UK, or wherever it is they lived. 

Therefore they tend to ask this question because they are genuinely curious why we choose to live in the 빨리 빨리 pressure cooker that is South Korea as opposed to our home countries.  I've had many students say, "I want to live in your country so badly!  Why on earth do you choose to live in mine???"  I always explain that Korea is generally easier on foreigners than it is on Koreans, and if it gets too frustrating, we can just leave 

Completely agree. I would have written something like this if you hadn't.

"Why don't you have a baby?"
"When are you going to have a baby?"
"Where is your baby?"
"Doesn't your husband want a baby?"
"Is there something wrong with your health? You don't have any children..."

SHUT UP.
SHUT UP.
SHUT UP.

I don't care what the sociocultural mores are here. This is a ****** rude question and I won't answer it anymore. My school's former gym teacher used to sit across from me at lunch and grill me in rapid-fire, loud Korean about why I wasn't giving my husband children. He even pointed at my stomach with his chopsticks one day and went "Balli balli!! BALLI BALLI!!!"

I just smiled and told him (through my CT) that I would have a baby as soon as he paid for a nice, big apartment.

I know it meant to be caring or whatever. I don't care. I've been at my school for a year and a half and they are still asking me about it every goddamn day. It's not like I'm approaching menopause and it's a time-sensitive issue, either.

I don't get the baby questions yet, but I get the marriage questions.  From everyone!  My students, teachers, his family and friends.  Randos on the street.  Seriously annoying.  Calm down, I will get married when I am ready but bleh!

My boyfriend is Korean and I get (from both Westerners and Koreans alike who know I don't speak Korean well):

'Does your boyfriend speak English?'

Like no... our whole relationship is one extremely long game of charades 

I always get, "can you eat spicy foods?"

That may be a genuine question I guess, but I'm Korean-American and I was weened on spicy foods before I even tasted milk.  It's funny how I can out drink most teachers at my school and can tolerate spicy foods more so than others and they're always shocked by this fact.

Now, whenever someone asks me if I can eat spicy foods, I just ask them if they can eat hamburgers or pizzas and looked surprised and then laugh out really loud when they say, "yes".

I swear sarcasm is lost on Koreans.   

The most annoying questions for me are any general "getting to know you" questions from random strangers.  I don't want to make new random friends on the street or exchange phone numbers at the bus stop.  I don't want to be someone's friend simply so that they can practice English.  That's not what friendship is. 

I teach uni English majors and they often ask me, "Why is it so hard to make foreign friends?  Where can I meet foreigners?"  I ask them why they want to meet foreigners.  The answer is always, "Because I want to practice English!"    First I commend them on their dedication to learning English, but then I clearly explain that wanting to practice English is not a good basis for friendship.  I tell them that in order to attract foreign friends, they themselves must be fun, interesting, outgoing, and casual.  Drop the Korean formalities and just act natural.  Share opinions and make raunchy jokes, but for the love of god do not ask, "Where are you from?  Do you like Korean food?  Is it too spicy for you?"    That's an instant way not to make new friends.

The thing that annoys me more about this than the actual questions is being singled out simply because I'm a foreigner. If a Korean started chatting with a random Korean at the bus stop, they would probably awkwardly walk away. But it's totally cool to practice your English on me because... reasons.

Also, you should explain the English word they are looking for is is not "foreign friend" it's "free tutor". That's what they are really looking for.

Teacher, candy?

Haha, yes! I gave my students candy on Halloween if they came to the office and said Trick or Treat. Some still came in and just said "Candy!" or "Candy please!" I sent them away.

"Why don't you have a baby?"
"When are you going to have a baby?"
"Where is your baby?"
"Doesn't your husband want a baby?"
"Is there something wrong with your health? You don't have any children..."

SHUT UP.
SHUT UP.
SHUT UP.

I don't care what the sociocultural mores are here. This is a ****** rude question and I won't answer it anymore. My school's former gym teacher used to sit across from me at lunch and grill me in rapid-fire, loud Korean about why I wasn't giving my husband children. He even pointed at my stomach with his chopsticks one day and went "Balli balli!! BALLI BALLI!!!"

I just smiled and told him (through my CT) that I would have a baby as soon as he paid for a nice, big apartment.

I know it meant to be caring or whatever. I don't care. I've been at my school for a year and a half and they are still asking me about it every goddamn day. It's not like I'm approaching menopause and it's a time-sensitive issue, either.

This can be incredibly annoying. I never thought this happened anywhere but apparently it happens in the US too. I guess just not to the same extent it does here. I've had people point to my crotch and ask if I have some problem. I've had others ask how hard I was trying. And then of course, the ones that are really concerned want to take me out for stamina food like eels.

To many Koreans, though, there is a time issue. If you aren't having babies by the time you're 30, "it's very dangerous" for the women, I've been told. I think the mindset has to do  with the fact that medicine wasn't as good as it is now and despite the rapid changes, most Koreans don't understand/believe that 30 is not expiration date for a uterus.

But don't worry. It's not just foreigners that are getting annoyed. The younger generation of Koreans are having less children too.

I don't really mind all the questions about age and height and babies and stuff like that because it's what Koreans are conditioned to ask anyone within 5 seconds of meeting them. The "do you know about kimchi/do you know about songpyeong" questions are pretty inane because you know they only learn that kind of thing from textbooks with weird sentences in them that no native speaker ever uses.

What gets to me is the fact that whenever a random Korean starts talking to you in English and seems like a really friendly and nice person, it always turns out they are a Jehovah's Witness proselytizing. Koreans just don't talk to strangers, especially foreigners.

One of my teachers always asks me if we have the most ubiquitous things in Canada.

"Do you have mushrooms in Canada?"
"Do you have beer in Canada?"
"Do you have peaches in Canada?"

And he's always surprised when I say yes, as if these things only exist in Korea along with grass and orgasms. Jesus Christ.

I can't really pin down the most annoying question. I know the first one that comes to mind is "Is it too spicy?" I even found it in a sample dialogue of our school's textbook. Haha one of my 3rd graders were giving a speech on ramen and included "It is too spicy for foreigners like teacher." I've met more Koreans who can't eat their own food than I have foreigners.

I'd say the most annoying thing Koreans do is get scared and begin to babble in broken English when I go to buy something. I speak pretty decent Korean and even after saying "한국어로 말하세요. 2 년 동안 공부했어요." The still act like a scared puppy with their tail between their legs. Do me the decency of speaking to me in Korean first. If I can't understand you, then use your body language, but at least respect someone enough not to assume they can't survive in your country.

For those Koreans who do speak to me in Korean, I hate it when they speak to me like Emimen in Rap God. I cut the older Koreans some slack as they probably haven't been learning English like the younger Koreans. But as for the young Koreans, you know what it's like to learn a language. Slow down! But again, I'd rather that they pay me the respect and speak to me in fast, confident Korean then scared English.

Have you heard of Gangnam Style?

I always get, "can you eat spicy foods?"

That may be a genuine question I guess, but I'm Korean-American and I was weened on spicy foods before I even tasted milk.  It's funny how I can out drink most teachers at my school and can tolerate spicy foods more so than others and they're always shocked by this fact.

Now, whenever someone asks me if I can eat spicy foods, I just ask them if they can eat hamburgers or pizzas and looked surprised and then laugh out really loud when they say, "yes".

I swear sarcasm is lost on Koreans.   

For me this goes away when I tell them we have Mexican food and Indian food back home which is much spicier than Korean food. "Ah, Mexshico food. Very very spicy."

Well it should be because they're reasoning is usually coming from very cynical and xenophobic place.

The questions you listed all annoyed me greatly (after a couple of years). It took me a while to wise up.

It's not just the questions. It's their loaded ignorance/cynicism/xenophobia that comes with these loaded questions. 

It really doesn't matter what questions a Korean asks me. I have all the data on them I need. It's simple really. A Korean has nothing to say that I can respect. It's a pity for those few Koreans that actually have something interesting to say. I met one of them once. He left Korea!!! He's in Wisconsin now I believe.

Who really cares what the forsaken Koreans ask? Not me, not anymore. Not in their sh1t factory toilet country at least, and generally not anywhere else either~
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God i loved that post.   :)

He's an ignorant **** and he's way out of line.

I'd love him to talk to me like that. I'm just looking for a fight. But everyone steers clear of me for some reason.

I didn't yell at him because my coteacher told me he had stage 4 stomach cancer and was coming to work anyways.

Found out later he just had his appendix out.

Still not sure how she got from point A to point B...rather sorry I missed an opportunity to get shitty with him, as he spent one post-lunch period telling me how happy he was during the 2011 tsunami in Japan. He knew full well that I had left Japan just a few months prior to the incident and that my husband had lost former students. The guy was a thunderdouche of the highest order.

In general I don't mind when random people ask me questions on the bus, unless it's clear I'm already engaged in another conversation with someone in person or, heaven help me, on the phone! Not okay to interrupt.

The one that gets me is whenever I show up to work sick and tell coworkers I'm sick their next question is almost always "why?". Of all the times to ask 'why?', Korea, why is it for when I'm sick?! 'Because it worked out that way on my schedule? Because I rolled around in some used tissues? What do you want from me? People get sick!'

Lol. It's not that big a deal but I just find it funny and I have to keep myself from giving sarcastic answers.

Don't mind the questions in general but I was recently asked 'Why do all foreigners think Korean girls are easy?'

I just walked away.

If random work people are wondering about "why" you are sick, this is the perfect time to disgust then with tales of vomiting and diarrhea. Tell them you got sick from a communal side-dishes, go into detail about what side dishes you eat, where you eat. The times of the pains, then the vomiting, how you had to run to the bathroom, how you couldn't even keep down a piece of dry toast. Too much information is often a useful tactic. Also, with such a in-depth and gross story nobody could suspect you of lying.