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Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« on: September 15, 2012, 05:54:50 pm »
I am finding out just now, at the near end of my contract, that this is why my co-teacher has been a b*tch most of the time. Everytime I make a minor mistake, she has gotten upset and let it boil inside of her. She'd been unwilling to tell me what she thought was wrong, but absolutely willing to get back at me with passive aggression.

The mistakes include forgetting to write sentences on the worksheets that were my idea. Because of one bad morning, she asked me to stop planning most of the classes and demoted me to only planning games.

Finally, I had a bad morning (really bad week) and the videos I took of the class role-play didn't work (a problem I thought I already solved on the class computer) and I forgot to send over this ppt. Minor first period issues, I thought. Coincidently, SHE forgot to make copies of the worksheet, which she has always done.

But of course, she tells me that she's upset, and she acts upset all day. Damnit.

I'm actually grateful she has finally been honest about it, but now I'm upset that this has been the cause of a sh*tty year.

When she's mad, I realize that's why she starts picking apart everything I do. As in, if she doesn't like the way I write something on the board, she erases it in front of the whole class and writes it again.


What should I do??? I've been STEAMING over this ever since Friday morning...


Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #1 on: September 17, 2012, 08:15:18 am »
Ugh, bloody awful that she has kept all this to herself and never told you what bothered her. At very least I would sit her down and have an honest but polite conversation about it. Tell her that had she communicated any of this to you in a direct manner the two of you could have gotten along much better.


Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #2 on: September 17, 2012, 11:40:08 am »
Thanks for the replies so far... Things are going pretty well today (since I'm taking the role of her lil b*tch). I will eventually sit her down, at least for the benefit of the next teacher. She needs to know passive aggressive crap is not the way to build a positive work space. I'm sure she doesn't like tension, either...


  • karoo_guy
  • Adventurer

    • 52

    • April 05, 2012, 12:51:16 pm
    • Incheon
Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #3 on: September 17, 2012, 12:27:49 pm »
It's Korea. The whole "I have authority over you" thing seems to mean that a great deal of Koreans see this as a licence to make us miserable. Don't worry, I've been planning games since the start, because I'm not a "real" teacher. Even the girl here who is an actual teacher, from the US and has experience, it treated like she's an idiot. 2 more weeks and then no more Korea! Can't wait...


  • kevin76
  • Veteran

    • 234

    • August 28, 2012, 06:35:01 pm
    • South Korea
Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #4 on: September 17, 2012, 12:39:40 pm »


Geezz, I thought I was one of the only ones being treated like an idiot. The other day I was told that I was lucky to
have a job in Korea. Hmm, I am only here 3 weeks and already my co-teacher is treating me like a doormat. Hard to take really because I have 4 years of experience already before i came here. Feeling like a foreigner and a "guest teacher" is being taken to the extreme with mine. To be honest there isn't much I can do about it now, just have to take it and keep my head down. So hearing your stories makes me feel even better that this may continue for another 51 weeks.  :o
 


  • karoo_guy
  • Adventurer

    • 52

    • April 05, 2012, 12:51:16 pm
    • Incheon
Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #5 on: September 17, 2012, 12:59:22 pm »
I think there are a LOT of people here that are treated badly. Life is too short, I don't know why everyone always says "stick it out". That only makes the problem worse... If we all leave in droves they will realise something is up. There are also SO many other teaching opportunities in Asia. I stuck it out for 6 months. I leave for Thailand in 2 weeks. Yes, I will earn less...but not much less. A good friend of mine there makes slightly less than I do here AND he saves more as the cost of living is so much cheaper. I think most unhappy people stay here because it's not easy to pick up again after moving here...


Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #6 on: September 18, 2012, 09:01:31 am »
HI all,

It really is an interesting set-up here between co-teacher and guest-teacher. 

I am a certified teacher with over 8 years experience teaching in Korea and Canada, I speak a bit of Korean, and I lived here for 2 years a number of years ago.  I mistakenly thought I would be shown a bit of respect by my co-teacher (she is about 13 years younger than me).  I was wrong. 

We do not get along so I have just decided to avoid her when possible and be fake friendly when not.  I won't have to worry about her doing my assesment for rehire as I am not reapplying but I imagine that is a stress to some people.  Good luck!


Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #7 on: September 18, 2012, 12:05:53 pm »
You guys... she just made a tearful apology today... I'm kind of in shock.

I actually made it clear to her today how miserable the year has been because of all the bull (another co-teacher trying to play power games with me, manipulate me, etc...)

There's hope that things will work out well before I leave.

And here's hope that everyone else can find peace with their co-teachers.

 :)


Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #8 on: September 18, 2012, 04:04:17 pm »
You guys... she just made a tearful apology today... I'm kind of in shock.

I actually made it clear to her today how miserable the year has been because of all the bull (another co-teacher trying to play power games with me, manipulate me, etc...)

There's hope that things will work out well before I leave.

And here's hope that everyone else can find peace with their co-teachers.

 :)
Nice, glad it worked out for you! I bet you wish you had brought it up earlier now don't you? ;)


  • kiwityke
  • Super Waygook

    • 335

    • October 20, 2011, 07:51:05 am
    • Gimpo, South Korea
Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #9 on: September 19, 2012, 11:04:47 am »
I had a similar situation. I changed co-teachers in March for the first month or so we were really close worked very well together and I had no problems at all. Then I didn't sit next to her at lunch one time and sat next to another teacher I was friendly with as I wanted to speak in Korean rather than English for a little while.

After this she started to be a massive b***h to me, ignoring me refusing to speak to me and if I was in a situation where everyone was speaking Korean she would refuse to translate, saying you can speak Korean (I can speak enough to get by thats all).

Basically one day I decided to treat her like she treated me, next day our boss came to tell me off about my attitude I told him about my co-teacher and how I had repeatedly spoken to her about her attitude towards in and outside the class.

When he sat her down and asked her why she just shrugged her shoulders and said I don't why I just don't want to talk to him. From then on I faked pleasantries and everything was fine.

I still got a great reference from the school as she was the only person in the school who had a problem with me at all.


  • dachiza727
  • Super Waygook

    • 417

    • June 24, 2010, 09:52:23 pm
    • South Korea
    more
Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #10 on: September 19, 2012, 11:59:01 am »
My first year here was pretty tough.  I had a co-teacher that despised me.  At first it was extremely annoying as I was depending on her for help at the workplace and with issues outside of work that a newbie might encounter.   (side story:  I remember when we first met.  We were sitting at dinner with many other new teachers and their respective CT's.  I tried to make casual conversation with her only to have her say that she doesn't like to talk while eating.  She prefers to savor the food without interruption. ㅋㅋㅋ From then on I knew i wasn't in Kansas anymore) After 6 months I just said the hell with it and just decided to ignore it as best i could.  I ignored the: dirty looks, showing me up in class, cold shoulder, micro-management, the undermining of authority in class.   

It took some serious patience, but it can be done.  In any event, having survived her sh*t for a year helped me to be: mentally stronger, more self-reliant outside of the workplace, and a better teacher.  If I could deal with her crap, then I could calmly handle the worst of students.  If I could put up with her BS, then I could deal with a random local cutting in front of me at the service desk line (this has happened a million times  :D  )

After my first year ended my CT changed schools.  3years later and it's been smooth sailing ever since.  But as bad as she was, I wouldn't change anything - she taught me alot.

my advice: do the best you can, don't stress the stuff you can't control.
"Iíll have a vanilla...one of those vanilla bullshit things. You know, whatever you want, some vanilla bullshit latte cappa thing. Whatever you got."

true dat.


Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #11 on: September 19, 2012, 12:02:05 pm »
You guys... she just made a tearful apology today... I'm kind of in shock.

I actually made it clear to her today how miserable the year has been because of all the bull (another co-teacher trying to play power games with me, manipulate me, etc...)

There's hope that things will work out well before I leave.

And here's hope that everyone else can find peace with their co-teachers.

 :)
Nice, glad it worked out for you! I bet you wish you had brought it up earlier now don't you? ;)


Hehe We've actually had a sort of "coming to Jesus" meeting before, but obviously things reverted. That's why I'm a teeny bit skeptical of this apology, but it was shocking to see her cry. Hopefully it's a real change of heart.

What I've learned is.... if someone shows you who they really are, don't doubt it for them. Just treat them / think of them accordingly and carry on.

I should have tried to have a better time and ignored the BS...


Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #12 on: September 19, 2012, 03:50:29 pm »
My coteacher hates me for being male.

And a westerner.

And because she doesn't believe the presentations I make myself are in fact made by myself because they're 'too good'. This is not meant to be a compliment but a legitimate complaint; she believes I'm a lazy thief.

But she mostly hates me because despite her being older than me, and in a higher position than me I REFUSE to accept her racist, sexist bullshit remarks.

So my mistake was basically COMING TO KOREA in her eyes.


Re: Does Your Co-Teacher Hate You For Minor Mistakes?
« Reply #13 on: September 20, 2012, 03:08:07 pm »
My coteacher hates me for being male.

And a westerner.

And because she doesn't believe the presentations I make myself are in fact made by myself because they're 'too good'. This is not meant to be a compliment but a legitimate complaint; she believes I'm a lazy thief.

But she mostly hates me because despite her being older than me, and in a higher position than me I REFUSE to accept her racist, sexist bullshit remarks.

So my mistake was basically COMING TO KOREA in her eyes.


She's probably a miserable, pitiful person. Don't let her affect your life!