Funny Co-Teacher's Comments

The most memorable moment I've had (and there have been plenty):

First full day of work (August 2009), most of us foreigners were supposed to be in Quarantine due to H1N1 so I was desk warming for 8 hours, wahoo. First thing in the morning I am supposed to give a speech to the entire teaching staff. I don't know Korean so I keep it simple and down to 10 words. The co teacher had a list of information she pulled out of me when she picked me up from orientation to take me to the apartment. These questions were along the lines of, "What is your hobby? What do you like to do on Saturdays? What is your ideal type? Do you have a girlfriend? Are you Christian? Do you miss your family? Do you like Kimchi?" Great, so on top of being the only foreigner in the school, all the teachers now think that I hike, fish, and take long walks on the beach on Saturdays, love all women, and really enjoy kimchi and hate my family. After this I am instructed to stand at the door to the room and shake everybody's hand as they leave and say something to me in English. 85% of the teachers said this exact phrase, "Hello. Nice to meet you. You are very handsome. Goodbye."

That is just round 1 of the first day.

I get told at 8:30 that the principal wants a meeting right away. I ask what it is about, the co teacher at the time says she doesn't know. I say that usually there are agendas or at least a topic for a meeting, not just go in and say hi, so I am a bit confused. We go there anyways. I am surprised at how nice the principal's office is; leather sofa, 12 leather seats, conference table, flat screen TV, fish tank, the works. It is just me, the co teacher, the vice principal and the principal. I sit down and an immediately uncomfortable because the leather squeaks and I have no idea what is going on. The vice principal leans in, "You are very handsome." Great, let's chalk up number 39 of the times I've heard that; so I say, "Thank you. You are handsome also." He chuckles a bit and says, "No. I am Korean." and makes a face as if he just ate a lemon, "You are white, so you are more handsome." Uhh. okay. Principal remarks, "Yes, very-uh, handsome-uhh." He doesn't speak a lick of English and obviously studied very hard for these next few phrases.

The co teacher tells me to ask what the meeting is about. But I don't speak Korean. At all. "What is this meeting about?" The principal looks as though the desk just got up, did a flamenco dance and then went back to being a desk. He leans in closer and says, "High-uh-school-uh girls..." I think, hmm, okay, probably the girls in this high school so I say, "The girls in this high school." "Yes!" ... "High-uh-school-uh girls... " He then crosses his forearms and firmly states, "NO!" So I suppose it is safe to assume he means don't do high school girls. I get it. I really, I mean really want to say quizzically, "High school boys?" But I think better of it and instead say, "Ahh, high school girls, no way." while making a slashing motion across my throat. Point taken, meeting is adjourned. Welcome to Korea.

ME: GOOD MORNING
KT:NICE TO MEET YOU TOO!  said very fast
ME: OH OK YES THANKYOU
KT: smiles!

This was not said by my co-teacher but one of the teachers I work with. He was giving me a ride home from bowling (we had just finished a teacher outing.)

T - What are you having for dinner?
Me - I'm making Salmon and Veggies.
T - What's seamen?
Me - No no, its Sam-in, Samm-in, not seamen, its a type of fish.
T - ohh Fish.

I think I'll pass on the salt filled dinner, thanks.

Me: What is that alarm for?
CT: I think... fire... practice
Me: Oh, ok.  What do we do?
CT: I think... the basement.
Me: For a fire?
CT: Yes, but i am new to this school.

Me: (smiling widely)

I got this one about 30 minutes while doing my korean homework.  I was in the middle of this sentance in korean "If i have time i will go to the bank."  A teacher that sits behind me leans in and says "You write so well.  You should be poet."

Today I wore my hair in braids, and I probably should have seen it coming, but:
"you look like student, not like teacher"

also loved this speech I got from a co-worker once.
"ah, america and korea custom very different. korea, we wear short bottom, america, ah, you wear short *gestures to neck area* here. very different. your shirt, you are *consults cell phone dictionary* showing, gaudy."

._.

a student, not a co teacher....

One boy student flipped off another student in class one day. Right in the middle of my lesson he starts screaming "Teacher, he f*cked me!" over and over.

Hardest thing ever to not laugh out loud.

I taught my co-teacher the phrase 'age before beauty'.
She memorized it and a few days later walked through a door before me,
stating ever-so-grandly 'the elder before the prettier!'

Me: What is that alarm for?
CT: I think... fire... practice
Me: Oh, ok.  What do we do?
CT: I think... the basement.
Me: For a fire?
CT: Yes, but i am new to this school.

Me: (smiling widely)

LOL...this just made my afternoon! I was in tears reading this I had to leave my teachers room!

My new co-teacher is really nice and she has spent some time in Canada so she is usually very "westernized" in her English. However, sometimes she gives me a backhanded compliment or doesn't realize she's being rude.

She said the pictures of me on my Facebook were pretty and very professional because I was wearing makeup, but usually I look like a university student. I said that I wear makeup every day and she was very surprised.

Maybe I should cake it on a little thicker.

my kids regularly ask me in the Clay Davis way from the wire " teacher, teacher - work sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiitt" cracks me up every time

LOL...love it! Do you think they know the show?  ;)

"You live like a monk."

CT - Couple!
Me - Couple?
CT - Yes, couple.
Me - ...?
CT - You come with me?
Me - ... oh, you mean 'car pool'.

My co-teacher gets her p's and f's mixed up. Common pronunciation problem for Koreans.

We were in the car and as she was trying to park she says 'Faking is hard.'

'Did you know, Jafan had a Tsunami?!?' (Two weeks after the Tsunami hit.)

'Mans is better than womans. I wish to lay a boy child. That is better than girl child.' (we're both women)

'When the foreigner lays a child with Korean, they poison the Korean blood.'

CT: Did you know some Koreans have jenopobic?
Me: Yes, some Koreans are a little xenophobic. Are you xenophobic?
CT: Yes, a little.

'When the foreigner lays a child with Korean, they poison the Korean blood.'

Ouch! It must be a pleasure to see her every morning.

i went to a rural school last semester that i no longer go to. the english teacher there now attends my workshop. I was pleased she had joined because we got along well.

She said to me today (first time i have seen her since december): "are you well? you look prettier this year".

Hmm...

This would make a great blog..."Funny things my coteacher says."

One night my friend and I were being followed by an old man, he thought we were prostitutes and kept yelling "You Russia? How much? Service-uh?"
The next day I told my coteacher and she burst out laughing and said " He must be crazy! You are way too fat to be a hooker!"  :D

One night my friend and I were being followed by an old man, he thought we were prostitutes and kept yelling "You Russia? How much? Service-uh?"
The next day I told my coteacher and she burst out laughing and said " He must be crazy! You are way too fat to be a hooker!"  :D

:o
Not to take it too far off topic, but I had this experience when I was teaching in a Chinese university.  I got my students to write a paper on various people in history (with the catch that they had to write about a famous Australian).  I had one student write about Sir Donald Bradman, the cricketer.  Throughout the entire essay, she referred to him as "Bonald Bradman".  I was reading it in front of a bunch of students, and was trying not to giggle each time I read it (I'm still not sure why that tickled me so much).  About half way through the essay, she wrote "Bonald Bradman, whose nickname was "Tang"...".  I cracked up and I had a laughing fit to the point where students were asking me if I was laughing or crying, genuinely concerned.  His nickname was "The Don", by the way, and I have no idea where "Tang" came from.

The best I've had from a Korean student was when I asked him to name 3 countries in Asia.  The reply came, "Korea, China and Japenis".  I couldn't help but laugh at that one.

retort with racism? hmmm no, no thanks.