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  • yeti08
  • Super Waygook

    • 388

    • July 03, 2011, 12:58:29 pm
    • Anyang
Very Perverted Student
« on: May 23, 2012, 09:33:10 pm »
Alright seems like a new problem to grace the waygook site. 
*Disclaimer*  I am in no way saying this is a Korean only problem, this can and does happen everywhere, just want advice on how to handle my last couple days. 

A male middle school grade two boy has gone way too far.  He really has a penis fetish.  It began with him seeking me out when I use the restroom and trying to gawk over the urinal wall to see my package.  I always yelled at him and shuffled closer to the urinal.  I told the hagwon director, she claimed she spoke to him and instructed me to use the stall (which I had planned on anyways).

It was calm for awhile, but recently it escalated to new heights.  I entered the bathroom during a class break (5 minutes) so I didn't have time to turn and go out.  I went into the stall even though the pervert was using the urinal.  He was talking to me while I was trying to overcome stage fright and then he started shaking the door and trying to get in.  I figured it may just be him trying to be funny so I yelled at him.  I exited the bathroom stall and he was standing there with his penis exposed and started dancing around.  I was appalled and totally taken aback.  I am leaving soon so part of me didn't want to address the issue with my boss.  I REALLY regret that now because today it happened again.  This time I did not hesitate. 
I have no idea what will happen to him, it happened as I was leaving and I did not stick around any longer than necessary. 

The kid definitely has mental problems.....and I hope he gets the help he needs, but I have a sneaking suspicion since this is a hagwon nothing will happen, because they don't want to lose business.

Anyone else have experience with this?


Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #1 on: May 24, 2012, 07:32:11 am »
He just needs to be told that it's unbecoming behaviour and that other people may not like it. 

He's not a pervert for crying out loud, he's a kid with innpaproriate behaviour.  A lot of times Korean kids, due to our not speaking Korean like an adult and us not being part of the confucian hierarchy will see us as being on the same level as them, so a big kid essentially, so he's probably trying to get you to play some 'willy shaking game' he plays with his friends or something.

Me and a mate used to show girls ours and shake em around behind this old shed at school.  Nothing sexual about it, just things kids do.  Koreans are a lot less freaked out about sexuality than westerners in a lot of ways also.  Heck, the kid probably had one of those photos taken of him as a baby with everything proudly on show, as is the custom in Korea.

He needs to be told firmly that you are an adult and not a kid his age, a teacher, an older male (sorry ladies but this is a big, big deal in SK) and he must behave towards you as one.

He should also be told that in the bathroom we (all people) should keep our private parts to ourselves, but not in an overly harsh way or one that makes him feel too ashamed, more of a 'this is not something people should do, but you didn't know that, now you do, don't do it anymore.'  No need to get angry or freaked out and give the poor little blighter some kind of complex.

If he doesn't display 'mental difficulties in other areas' then that's all he needs. 


  • lotte world
  • The Legend

    • 2272

    • August 22, 2011, 09:00:38 pm
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Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #2 on: May 24, 2012, 08:25:45 am »
This is actually quite common in Japan.  Students may try to touch you or grab you.  It's a cultural difference which is obviously uncomfortable and unexpected for westerners.  A bit like dong-shim I suppose.

I am sure you dealt with it well, but you should probably explain the situation to your handler and get them to do something about it.  Perhaps make it clear that you don't want him to be punished, but you do want him to stop.


  • yeti08
  • Super Waygook

    • 388

    • July 03, 2011, 12:58:29 pm
    • Anyang
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #3 on: May 24, 2012, 11:29:02 am »
He is 14 years old Western age.  When is it no longer a "cultural difference" and flat out inexcusable?  I am no prude, but I do expect a bit of privacy and decency in the work place.  Had I been at Jjimjilbang then I'd "Yah!" and walk away. 

« Last Edit: May 24, 2012, 11:47:16 am by yeti08 »


  • misskris
  • Expert Waygook

    • 558

    • October 08, 2010, 02:46:41 pm
    • seoul
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #4 on: May 24, 2012, 11:40:31 am »
He is 14 years old Western age.  When is it no longer a "cultural difference" and flat out inexcusable.  I am no prude, but I do expect a bit of privacy and decency in the work place.  Had I been at Jjimjilbang then I'd "Yah!" and walk away.

I totally agree.  He is old enough to know that that kind of behaviour is inappropriate...esp ecially with his teacher.


  • lotte world
  • The Legend

    • 2272

    • August 22, 2011, 09:00:38 pm
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Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #5 on: May 24, 2012, 12:13:08 pm »
He is 14 years old Western age.  When is it no longer a "cultural difference" and flat out inexcusable.  I am no prude, but I do expect a bit of privacy and decency in the work place.  Had I been at Jjimjilbang then I'd "Yah!" and walk away.

I totally agree.  He is old enough to know that that kind of behaviour is inappropriate...esp ecially with his teacher.

He is old enough to know that that kind of behaviour is inappropriate if he was in the west.

There FTFY.

Do not judge behaviour here by your standards from home.

You should ask a Korean (such as your co-teacher) if this is normal or acceptable here.  Then you can make it clear it is not done 'back home'.


  • madison79
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1372

    • October 19, 2010, 01:26:04 pm
    • Interweb
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #6 on: May 24, 2012, 01:23:55 pm »
This is actually quite common in Japan.  Students may try to touch you or grab you.  It's a cultural difference which is obviously uncomfortable and unexpected for westerners.  A bit like dong-shim I suppose.

I am sure you dealt with it well, but you should probably explain the situation to your handler and get them to do something about it.  Perhaps make it clear that you don't want him to be punished, but you do want him to stop.

This is pretty common when trying to poop in Elementary schools. 
It's -ev to deal with some people.


  • yeti08
  • Super Waygook

    • 388

    • July 03, 2011, 12:58:29 pm
    • Anyang
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #7 on: May 24, 2012, 01:37:43 pm »
He is 14 years old Western age.  When is it no longer a "cultural difference" and flat out inexcusable.  I am no prude, but I do expect a bit of privacy and decency in the work place.  Had I been at Jjimjilbang then I'd "Yah!" and walk away.

I totally agree.  He is old enough to know that that kind of behaviour is inappropriate...esp ecially with his teacher.

He is old enough to know that that kind of behaviour is inappropriate if he was in the west.

There FTFY.

Do not judge behaviour here by your standards from home.

You should ask a Korean (such as your co-teacher) if this is normal or acceptable here.  Then you can make it clear it is not done 'back home'.

I asked my brother in law.  He chuckled and said he's too old for that especially with a teacher.  I asked my wife and she was disgusted.  I asked my mother in law and she said she would have slapped him.
A co-teacher said she hopes the owner scolds him a lot because that is not acceptable. 
Maybe you're okay with getting poked in the butthole and shown a penis because it's "wacky" Korea, but I am not, and it seems like many Koreans are not okay with a 14 year old pulling his penis out at school.


Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #8 on: May 24, 2012, 02:41:10 pm »
You could have, you know - told us he was 14 YEARS OLD IN THE OP!

Woulda saved a lot of misunderstanding.

My post still stands though, kid needs a lecture about who you are, your role in the school and how he should treat you. As well as having his behaviour explained to him and why it is not acceptable.

There is no real mystery here or anything for anyone to be confused or up in arms about.

And you have been here long enough to know Koreans are very immature when it comes to sexual development and sexual mentality compared to westerners.  So THERE IS a cultural element.  Heck my Korean high schoolers used to play what they called 'the hamburger game' where 13 - 14 year old boys would lie 3 on top of each other and hump each other.  The other K-kids just laughed.  In the west they would be called fags and literally get the crap kicked out of them, at least in most parts of England.

But yeah if your boss is not implementing the lectures along the lines of what I wrote before, you should get on that and demand it.


Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #9 on: May 24, 2012, 03:26:49 pm »
He did state the students age in the OP. He calls him a middle school grade 2 student.

Anyway, seems like you've got a handle on the situation. It's disturbing to hear about that kind of behavior from a boy that age. He's probably just a bit of a weirdo, but let's hope he doesn't turn into a perverted weirdo.  Who knows? Maybe this is how Burberry Men get their start?

I think it's a really hard time to be a boy in Korea right now. They're having a bit of an identity crisis, so I think it's better to deal with this kid tactfully and not too harshily. As someone said, don't give him a complex!  I've noticed a marked drop in affectionate physical interaction between boys in the past 2 years and a bit that I've been here. When I first came I had boys sitting in each other's laps and stroking each others arms and hair during class. Nowadays they get into play fights and maybe slap each other's butts, but no real cuddling.

Between that and the rise in gay-bashing/gay jokes, I'm sad for my boys. I don't want them to turn into the uber-macho men of the west with no ability to connect to their sensitive sides!

Sorry I seem to have branched off-topic!


  • donuts81
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1364

    • October 20, 2010, 10:23:37 am
    • Korea
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #10 on: May 24, 2012, 03:45:46 pm »
You could have, you know - told us he was 14 YEARS OLD IN THE OP

He did.

A male middle school grade two boy has gone way too far. 

And I'm with the OP, this is pretty messed up and definitely age inappropriate in for either culture. There is no way that this is a simple cultural misunderstanding.

Have your boss talk to him. If he does it again, ask for him to be kicked out of the school.

"You can't hurt me now, Mr Lee. I've lost all feeling"


  • Morticae
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1400

    • August 31, 2010, 12:45:33 pm
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #11 on: May 24, 2012, 04:10:45 pm »
This is definitely not normal behavior, there is nothing cultural about it so let's not see one of those posts.

Unfortunately I don't think much can be done about this on your end. You've reported it. I guess case closed.

You could try not using the bathroom at work. (If you have that ability)


  • yeti08
  • Super Waygook

    • 388

    • July 03, 2011, 12:58:29 pm
    • Anyang
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #12 on: May 24, 2012, 04:14:09 pm »
You could have, you know - told us he was 14 YEARS OLD IN THE OP!

Woulda saved a lot of misunderstanding.

My post still stands though, kid needs a lecture about who you are, your role in the school and how he should treat you. As well as having his behaviour explained to him and why it is not acceptable.

There is no real mystery here or anything for anyone to be confused or up in arms about.

And you have been here long enough to know Koreans are very immature when it comes to sexual development and sexual mentality compared to westerners.  So THERE IS a cultural element.  Heck my Korean high schoolers used to play what they called 'the hamburger game' where 13 - 14 year old boys would lie 3 on top of each other and hump each other.  The other K-kids just laughed.  In the west they would be called fags and literally get the crap kicked out of them, at least in most parts of England.

But yeah if your boss is not implementing the lectures along the lines of what I wrote before, you should get on that and demand it.

A male middle school grade two boy has gone way too far  Not good enough for you?


  • kps1
  • Expert Waygook

    • 637

    • June 04, 2010, 08:20:13 am
    • South Korea
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #13 on: May 24, 2012, 04:19:15 pm »
Kid sounds like a right Rupert.


  • Smaug
  • Veteran

    • 207

    • October 07, 2010, 02:09:00 pm
    • Korea
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #14 on: May 24, 2012, 04:21:06 pm »
i read a korean children book at emart. the pic on the cover was total sax. it was about a little girl who wants to touch her dad. the dad lets her touch his thang. i am not making this up. it was real cute and nice. had a bathtub picture. but yeah it was all so sick and twisted imo. so ya it is ok for kids here to touch ur wang. sorry it is what it is. do not think him strange. he is just a regular kid.
i am not trolling in fact. i can go to the kid book section and take a pic. i will put it on here if u all say i lie. but it was with all the other kiddy books...
Herbalife http://tinyurl.com/l27uct3 ahh no thx!
Apa! http://tinyurl.com/kmfr9du
Saliva "Your Disease" Do you know the Fat guy at 2:07?  http://tinyurl.com/l52w76v
Skyrim http://tinyurl.com/cqb32bp


  • yeti08
  • Super Waygook

    • 388

    • July 03, 2011, 12:58:29 pm
    • Anyang
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #15 on: May 24, 2012, 04:41:12 pm »
i read a korean children book at emart. the pic on the cover was total sax. it was about a little girl who wants to touch her dad. the dad lets her touch his thang. i am not making this up. it was real cute and nice. had a bathtub picture. but yeah it was all so sick and twisted imo. so ya it is ok for kids here to touch ur wang. sorry it is what it is. do not think him strange. he is just a regular kid.
i am not trolling in fact. i can go to the kid book section and take a pic. i will put it on here if u all say i lie. but it was with all the other kiddy books...

You sir are an idiot.  I am not his dad and he is not a little kid.  Maybe you can learn English one of these days my god......
« Last Edit: May 24, 2012, 05:42:52 pm by yeti08 »


  • bb
  • Super Waygook

    • 284

    • October 20, 2010, 08:19:17 am
    • korea
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #16 on: May 24, 2012, 07:08:11 pm »
The impulse to excuse messed up behavior as being  based on cultural differences comes from a good place and cultural relativism is a must here, there, or anywhere. But I think writing off every mishap as being cultural actually has a backlash.  To suggest we live in a country of peeping tom wang grabbers in the interest of excusing one kid is pretty offensive to the vast majority of non-wang grabbing Koreans. Also, let's not overlook that the issue isn't entirely wang-centric. It has to do with a kid willfully and knowingly making someone else uncomfortable. That's the real issue and has nothing to do with culture.


Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #17 on: May 25, 2012, 02:16:27 am »
You could have, you know - told us he was 14 YEARS OLD IN THE OP!

Woulda saved a lot of misunderstanding.

My post still stands though, kid needs a lecture about who you are, your role in the school and how he should treat you. As well as having his behaviour explained to him and why it is not acceptable.

There is no real mystery here or anything for anyone to be confused or up in arms about.

And you have been here long enough to know Koreans are very immature when it comes to sexual development and sexual mentality compared to westerners.  So THERE IS a cultural element.  Heck my Korean high schoolers used to play what they called 'the hamburger game' where 13 - 14 year old boys would lie 3 on top of each other and hump each other.  The other K-kids just laughed.  In the west they would be called fags and literally get the crap kicked out of them, at least in most parts of England.

But yeah if your boss is not implementing the lectures along the lines of what I wrote before, you should get on that and demand it.

He did say that the student was a 2nd year middle school student. How was his age not clear?

Yeah must have missed that part.  Thanks for pointing it out though...


  • confusedsafferinkorea
  • Waygook Lord

    • 5722

    • October 08, 2010, 01:02:32 pm
    • Zhubei, Hsinchu County, Taiwan (not part of China)
    more
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #18 on: May 25, 2012, 05:45:16 am »
The impulse to excuse messed up behavior as being  based on cultural differences comes from a good place and cultural relativism is a must here, there, or anywhere. But I think writing off every mishap as being cultural actually has a backlash.  To suggest we live in a country of peeping tom wang grabbers in the interest of excusing one kid is pretty offensive to the vast majority of non-wang grabbing Koreans. Also, let's not overlook that the issue isn't entirely wang-centric. It has to do with a kid willfully and knowingly making someone else uncomfortable. That's the real issue and has nothing to do with culture.

Yes, yes, yes........ what he did (is doing) is unacceptable in ANY culture.  In my opinion too, so are bad manners and lack of respect. When people justify any anti-social behaviour by saying it is 'cultural', it gets up my nose and smacks of being a supreme apologist.
There is no known medical cure for stupidity!


  • Cereal
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1239

    • March 16, 2011, 12:51:55 pm
    • Earth
    more
Re: Very Perverted Student
« Reply #19 on: May 25, 2012, 08:35:07 am »
Cultural relativism at some point - like this one -  becomes complete claptrap.

This kid is exhibiting behaviour that is disturbing and sexually deviant at an age when he should absolutely know better.

Every red flag is waving here. This is the behaviour virtually every adult sexual deviant/pervert/molester exhibits when they are young.

Something needs to be done with this young man before he grows to become something potentially dangerous, instead of merely disturbing, to society at large.

I'd hate to say, "I told you so" in 10 years.
"The urge to destroy is also a creative urge."
Bakunin