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  • Observer
  • Adventurer

    • 29

    • February 04, 2015, 07:42:35 am
    • Great Lakes
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #40 on: October 23, 2019, 10:34:33 am »
Ooooh, an interesting and thoroughly engaging thread! Aw, Waygook, every so often, still has it in it. Reminds me of the old days.

My only real contribution is to add to the caution about Westerners who take their Asian GF/BF/wife/husband at their word that they 'would love to move abroad.'

In my experience, this is delusion. Koreans are among the worst, but in reality very few Asians of any kind truly want to permanently relocate abroad, to the West or anywhere else. They want to live in their home countries. If they move it's usually to get something they want, such as a foreign degree, or to make money, or for a temporary opportunity in their profession (for example). And when they have it, the degree or the money or the experience, they move back. Or they are essentially forced by poverty/circumstances, such as the unfortunate SE Asian women who are married to Korean farmers.

The ones who do move permanently, like if they start their own business, they will settle down but if you talk to them, they often aren't very happy. They deal with it, they throw themselves into the business or their Western-born kids or whatever, but if you really talk to them, they will never lose the wish to be in their 'home,' which will absolutely never be the US or Canada or the UK or whatever. East Asians, Chinese and Japanese and Koreans, are the worst. SE Asians and S Asians, like Filipinos or Indians, have a bit easier time, in my experience.

The ones mentioned in this thread, who tell their foreign SOs that they are totally on board with moving--all I can is say is, beware of hearing what you want to hear, especially from young-ish women. They know how badly you want to go, likely. They also probably have a romantic fantasy of how it is to live abroad, from TV or YouTube or Instagram or whatever. They like the idea of having lived abroad, and of course they have a serious relationship with a foreigner (you!) and they haven't really considered the reality. Such as how difficult it is for them to get a decent job, or any job, the loss of their entire friend network, the distance from their family, the totally alien cultural behaviors...the different food, the loneliness, the boredom....lots of stuff. Even if they've studied abroad, for example, being in a formal program with housing and food and fellow Koreans around, probably in a big city, and with classes and internships and organized activities, is a WHOLE lot different from moving into some town or suburb that is 90% white, with nothing but the Internet to do all day.

Better to make your peace living over here and keep her/him happy ('happy wife, happy life') or marry a Westerner if you want to live in the West. When I get married, all I'm going to ask of her is that we can live for a while in different parts of Asia outside her home country, and visit the US once every year or two. Otherwise, I'm OK with the long-term expat life. Not what I thought I'd get at the start, but I've made my peace by now.


  • oglop
  • The Legend

    • 4323

    • August 25, 2011, 07:24:54 pm
    • Seoul
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #41 on: October 23, 2019, 12:36:39 pm »

3. F-6 visa does not mean automatic riches.  I know many F6's who make no more than regular E2s.   Beware of the people on these forums who love to exaggerate their income.   Many are full of it.

how much you earn simply depends on how hard you wanna work (and if you live in seoul or not). but it does open more doors, for sure

I'm happy with my easy 9-5 schedule making 3.2 million post tax. Wife wanted me to do more teaching but I pretty much enjoy my free time. I didn't want to get burned out so I said "I'll add an after school class if you want to do more of the house work that I do because I come earlier."

Still, finishing at 5.
that's fair. the nice thing about F visas is you can always pick up more classes, or drop them, depending on how you feel


  • hangook77
  • The Legend

    • 2140

    • September 14, 2017, 09:10:12 am
    • Near Busan
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #42 on: October 23, 2019, 12:44:40 pm »
One of the things about the wife being in charge of the money, let me tell you, there are actually a lot of liberal art grad guys, even some older guys who have no clue.  They know nothing about money or even simple things like insuring their deposits etc.  They "let their wife handle it".  Completely ignorant about money and financial stuff.  Shocking, I know.  So maybe letting their wife be in charge in some cases I guess works for them.  Though I did know a guy married to a bad Korean girl.  She was wild.  Borrowed money from loan sharks behind his back.  They had to split and move back to his home country to escape it.  They had to give up whatever money they had to appease some of them for a time. 

All I can say for most guys here is to pull their head of their arse and know what the hell's going on.  Give some money as an allowance if only one is working but keep in control of some of the money.  If you both are working, you both agree with set of bills to pay or what to save for.  (Sometimes, Koreans can get better deals and access to more financial items for saving investing with better rates, etc.) 

Yet these same liberal art grad with their "feelings" vote back home and f@k up the economies back home.  But that's for another thread. 


  • zola
  • The Legend

    • 2917

    • September 30, 2012, 06:56:11 am
    • Korea
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #43 on: October 23, 2019, 12:56:02 pm »
Yet these same liberal art grad with their "feelings" vote back home and f@k up the economies back home.  But that's for another thread. 
Why are you the way that you are?
Kpip! - Martin 2018


  • leaponover
  • Expert Waygook

    • 709

    • March 05, 2012, 12:08:16 pm
    • Iksan, S. Korea
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #44 on: October 23, 2019, 03:42:01 pm »


This is one I've heard from Korean men a lot. Who the Fark would agree to this? You know what I would say to my wife if she asked me to hand over my paycheck? "No." I'd expect the same if I asked her for the same.

A lot of, by the sounds of it, ball less guys get married to dragon women here. Marriage is marriage. The same rules apply weather it's here, back home, or where ever else: don't marry psychos. 





You've heard it a lot because it's the norm.  My wife always takes a little dig at me when we make a big purchase and she says, "Why don't you pay some of your paycheck.  No Korean man keeps their money like you do".  Usually I just retort with, "I'm home every night and not partying with my mistress, so do you want me to be Korean or be myself?".

That usually ends it right there, but my wife isn't a psycho, that's the way things actually work here for the majority of couples.


  • leaponover
  • Expert Waygook

    • 709

    • March 05, 2012, 12:08:16 pm
    • Iksan, S. Korea
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #45 on: October 23, 2019, 03:50:04 pm »
Ooooh, an interesting and thoroughly engaging thread! Aw, Waygook, every so often, still has it in it. Reminds me of the old days.

My only real contribution is to add to the caution about Westerners who take their Asian GF/BF/wife/husband at their word that they 'would love to move abroad.'

In my experience, this is delusion. Koreans are among the worst, but in reality very few Asians of any kind truly want to permanently relocate abroad, to the West or anywhere else. They want to live in their home countries. If they move it's usually to get something they want, such as a foreign degree, or to make money, or for a temporary opportunity in their profession (for example). And when they have it, the degree or the money or the experience, they move back. Or they are essentially forced by poverty/circumstances, such as the unfortunate SE Asian women who are married to Korean farmers.

The ones who do move permanently, like if they start their own business, they will settle down but if you talk to them, they often aren't very happy. They deal with it, they throw themselves into the business or their Western-born kids or whatever, but if you really talk to them, they will never lose the wish to be in their 'home,' which will absolutely never be the US or Canada or the UK or whatever. East Asians, Chinese and Japanese and Koreans, are the worst. SE Asians and S Asians, like Filipinos or Indians, have a bit easier time, in my experience.

The ones mentioned in this thread, who tell their foreign SOs that they are totally on board with moving--all I can is say is, beware of hearing what you want to hear, especially from young-ish women. They know how badly you want to go, likely. They also probably have a romantic fantasy of how it is to live abroad, from TV or YouTube or Instagram or whatever. They like the idea of having lived abroad, and of course they have a serious relationship with a foreigner (you!) and they haven't really considered the reality. Such as how difficult it is for them to get a decent job, or any job, the loss of their entire friend network, the distance from their family, the totally alien cultural behaviors...the different food, the loneliness, the boredom....lots of stuff. Even if they've studied abroad, for example, being in a formal program with housing and food and fellow Koreans around, probably in a big city, and with classes and internships and organized activities, is a WHOLE lot different from moving into some town or suburb that is 90% white, with nothing but the Internet to do all day.

Better to make your peace living over here and keep her/him happy ('happy wife, happy life') or marry a Westerner if you want to live in the West. When I get married, all I'm going to ask of her is that we can live for a while in different parts of Asia outside her home country, and visit the US once every year or two. Otherwise, I'm OK with the long-term expat life. Not what I thought I'd get at the start, but I've made my peace by now.

This is a good point.  Waygookins here complain about Korea but it's not actually because it's Korea.  It's because it's not home.  Every time one thinks it's really hard to live here, that's exactly how an Asian will feel living abroad in  Western country.  That attitude "I'd never raise a family here" could easily be echoed by a Korean wife when living in the USA and all those things you talked about go out the door, because she was unequipped with the knowledge of what she was agreeing to.


  • pkjh
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1906

    • May 02, 2012, 02:59:44 pm
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #46 on: October 23, 2019, 05:32:09 pm »
Ooooh, an interesting and thoroughly engaging thread! Aw, Waygook, every so often, still has it in it. Reminds me of the old days.

My only real contribution is to add to the caution about Westerners who take their Asian GF/BF/wife/husband at their word that they 'would love to move abroad.'

In my experience, this is delusion. Koreans are among the worst, but in reality very few Asians of any kind truly want to permanently relocate abroad, to the West or anywhere else. They want to live in their home countries. If they move it's usually to get something they want, such as a foreign degree, or to make money, or for a temporary opportunity in their profession (for example). And when they have it, the degree or the money or the experience, they move back. Or they are essentially forced by poverty/circumstances, such as the unfortunate SE Asian women who are married to Korean farmers.

The ones who do move permanently, like if they start their own business, they will settle down but if you talk to them, they often aren't very happy. They deal with it, they throw themselves into the business or their Western-born kids or whatever, but if you really talk to them, they will never lose the wish to be in their 'home,' which will absolutely never be the US or Canada or the UK or whatever. East Asians, Chinese and Japanese and Koreans, are the worst. SE Asians and S Asians, like Filipinos or Indians, have a bit easier time, in my experience.

The ones mentioned in this thread, who tell their foreign SOs that they are totally on board with moving--all I can is say is, beware of hearing what you want to hear, especially from young-ish women. They know how badly you want to go, likely. They also probably have a romantic fantasy of how it is to live abroad, from TV or YouTube or Instagram or whatever. They like the idea of having lived abroad, and of course they have a serious relationship with a foreigner (you!) and they haven't really considered the reality. Such as how difficult it is for them to get a decent job, or any job, the loss of their entire friend network, the distance from their family, the totally alien cultural behaviors...the different food, the loneliness, the boredom....lots of stuff. Even if they've studied abroad, for example, being in a formal program with housing and food and fellow Koreans around, probably in a big city, and with classes and internships and organized activities, is a WHOLE lot different from moving into some town or suburb that is 90% white, with nothing but the Internet to do all day.

Better to make your peace living over here and keep her/him happy ('happy wife, happy life') or marry a Westerner if you want to live in the West. When I get married, all I'm going to ask of her is that we can live for a while in different parts of Asia outside her home country, and visit the US once every year or two. Otherwise, I'm OK with the long-term expat life. Not what I thought I'd get at the start, but I've made my peace by now.

This is a good point.  Waygookins here complain about Korea but it's not actually because it's Korea.  It's because it's not home.  Every time one thinks it's really hard to live here, that's exactly how an Asian will feel living abroad in  Western country.  That attitude "I'd never raise a family here" could easily be echoed by a Korean wife when living in the USA and all those things you talked about go out the door, because she was unequipped with the knowledge of what she was agreeing to.
If you talk to most immigrants that came in that 1960-1990 era, most of them went to the west to study, or make money, and planned on going back to their home countries. But, life happens they get a decent paying job, they meet someone (often meeting someone from their own country), marry, have kids, buy a house, and once the kids starts school it's pretty hard to pick up and go back home. Often I've heard immigrants from South Korea, Singapore, and Taiwan say things along the lines of "If I would have known how much my country would have developed, I would have never left."


  • gogators!
  • The Legend

    • 4272

    • March 16, 2016, 04:35:48 pm
    • Seoul
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #47 on: October 23, 2019, 07:12:34 pm »
As far as marrying a Korean woman goes, marrying a public school teacher is like hitting the jackpot.

If you work hard at whatever it is you do, treat your wife well and respect Korean traditions on the big holidays, her parents will come around.


  • oglop
  • The Legend

    • 4323

    • August 25, 2011, 07:24:54 pm
    • Seoul
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #48 on: October 23, 2019, 07:20:48 pm »
Often I've heard immigrants from South Korea, Singapore, and Taiwan say things along the lines of "If I would have known how much my country would have developed, I would have never left."
well, that's probably because english isn't their first language. otherwise, they'd probably say, "if i have known how much my country would develop, i would never have left"


  • stoat
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1733

    • March 05, 2019, 06:36:13 pm
    • seoul
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #49 on: October 23, 2019, 07:34:07 pm »
Often I've heard immigrants from South Korea, Singapore, and Taiwan say things along the lines of "If I would have known how much my country would have developed, I would have never left."
well, that's probably because english isn't their first language. otherwise, they'd probably say, "if i have known how much my country would develop, i would never have left"

You mean 'if I had known how much my country would develop, I would never have left"


  • fka
  • Expert Waygook

    • 596

    • September 05, 2019, 06:37:44 pm
    • Seoul
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #50 on: October 23, 2019, 07:54:35 pm »
Often I've heard immigrants from South Korea, Singapore, and Taiwan say things along the lines of "If I would have known how much my country would have developed, I would have never left."
well, that's probably because english isn't their first language. otherwise, they'd probably say, "if i have known how much my country would develop, i would never have left"

You mean 'if I had known how much my country would develop, I would never have left"

Actually, I think you mean, "If I had known how much my country would develop, I would never have left."


  • oglop
  • The Legend

    • 4323

    • August 25, 2011, 07:24:54 pm
    • Seoul
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #51 on: October 23, 2019, 09:07:11 pm »
Often I've heard immigrants from South Korea, Singapore, and Taiwan say things along the lines of "If I would have known how much my country would have developed, I would have never left."
well, that's probably because english isn't their first language. otherwise, they'd probably say, "if i have known how much my country would develop, i would never have left"

You mean 'if I had known how much my country would develop, I would never have left"
Had*

haha goddammit I triple checked I didn't typo too

bye, leaving this forum forever in shame


  • pkjh
  • Hero of Waygookistan

    • 1906

    • May 02, 2012, 02:59:44 pm
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #52 on: October 23, 2019, 09:34:52 pm »
she takes the teacher test again for that city/province
Supposedly full-time tenured public school teachers don't necessarily have to take the test again to transfer provinces. Provinces 'trade' teachers often because of being newly married, or a spouse being transferred because of work. However, I think it's only a handful being traded every semester, and it's like a waiting list, where seniority, and whatever subject they need, puts you at the top of the list.


Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #53 on: October 24, 2019, 06:47:22 am »
Often I've heard immigrants from South Korea, Singapore, and Taiwan say things along the lines of "If I would have known how much my country would have developed, I would have never left."
well, that's probably because english isn't their first language. otherwise, they'd probably say, "if i have known how much my country would develop, i would never have left"

You mean 'if I had known how much my country would develop, I would never have left"
Had*

haha goddammit I triple checked I didn't typo too

bye, leaving this forum forever in shame

I'm going to start distancing myself from you now if that's okay?  Where were you from again?  France? 


  • oglop
  • The Legend

    • 4323

    • August 25, 2011, 07:24:54 pm
    • Seoul
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #54 on: October 24, 2019, 07:52:06 am »
worse. scotland


Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #55 on: October 24, 2019, 08:14:10 am »
worse. scotland

Jesus.  Sorry to hear that.  It could be worse, you could be from Blackpool.  :-[


  • L I
  • Waygook Lord

    • 5211

    • October 03, 2011, 01:50:58 pm
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #56 on: December 08, 2019, 06:22:57 pm »
Do you want to be in your 40s and 50's hanging out with people who are 25 at the expat bar?
Depends on who you are. If you're cool with banter and you know what people wanna talk about, you'll fit right in.

Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, partying, clubbing, EDM, dj festivals, Cardi B, Cancun spring break, trap music....

Learn the words to the popular club bangers of the day so you can sing and dance along.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x3xT5_je9BM

PERCOCETS, MOLLY, PERCOCETS
PERCOCETS, MOLLY, PERCOCETS
REP THE SET, GOTTA REP THE SET

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6F37L7vtyw

^^ You can introduce a song from when you were younger.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPTlvQ1Zet0

Age ain't nothing but a number.


  • VanIslander
  • Moderator LVL 1

    • 2042

    • June 02, 2011, 10:12:19 am
    • Seogwipo, Jeju Island
    more
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #57 on: December 08, 2019, 08:39:16 pm »
Do you want to be 50 years old and hanging out with old people?

I am 50 and enjoy more hanging out with my 36-year-old bud than the 50+ year olds around here.

Maybe it's spending hours every day with children that makes me feel young.

Friends back home my age remind me more of my dad in his sixties and seventies.

Age is a state of mind. I used to scoff at that idea but i now get why it seems like it.


  • L I
  • Waygook Lord

    • 5211

    • October 03, 2011, 01:50:58 pm
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #58 on: December 08, 2019, 08:55:42 pm »
I agree. Exercise to stay in shape. Hang out with younger folk. Feel young. Be young. It's a state of mind.


  • L I
  • Waygook Lord

    • 5211

    • October 03, 2011, 01:50:58 pm
Re: Marrying a Korean Public School teacher?
« Reply #59 on: December 09, 2019, 02:08:22 pm »
yeah imagine giving your whole salary to your wife and having to beg for some pocket money