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  • Mezoti97
  • The Legend

    • 2697

    • April 14, 2011, 03:02:50 pm
    • South Korea
Re: Help me name my child
« Reply #40 on: March 27, 2019, 04:23:11 pm »
Yes, indeed. She feels the child will be open to ridicule if it takes a foreign family name (mine is simple enough, only two syllables).

Any thoughts/experience on this?

Yes, I have a thought. How profoundly ignorant, bigoted and racist would someone have to be to ridicule a child because their surname is Western? Seriously???

Oh yeah....it's Korea. Sorry.......

I got bullied and made fun of a lot when I was a kid growing up back in my home country, since my family name doesn't sound Western (I'm from a small town that was not diverse and was mostly populated by white people). One of my cousins is half white and I remember she told me that her classmates bullied and made fun of her about her family name, too, even though she has a Western-sounding family name. Obviously not condoning it, but I guess the reality is that some kids will find any reason to pick on someone else, whether it be because they have a foreign-sounding family name or something else.
« Last Edit: March 27, 2019, 04:26:16 pm by Mezoti97 »


  • SanderB
  • Super Waygook

    • 435

    • June 02, 2018, 06:25:54 pm
    • Burning Oil Be Best
Re: Help me name my child
« Reply #41 on: March 27, 2019, 04:31:59 pm »


So, my two sons (written in Western order):

1.) William Ahn Ra****
2.) Louis Ahn Ra****

It's a word game! 8)
Radiant
Ralphsz
Randsz
or:
(Dapper) Rapper
Ranchdressing

 :wink:
Fiat voluntas tua- What you want is allowed


Re: Help me name my child
« Reply #42 on: March 27, 2019, 05:01:24 pm »
All my kids official paperwork has my name as the family name. She goes by her middle name kim when she is at daycare. Itís not really that big a deal. At least not with my wife. She said daycare had trouble pronouncing my name it didnít bother me.


  • pkjh
  • The Legend

    • 2068

    • May 02, 2012, 02:59:44 pm
    • Asia
Re: Help me name my child
« Reply #43 on: March 27, 2019, 06:30:57 pm »
Canít speak Korean or English?  You definitely have to work at the bilingual aspect but our kids first language is English. They pick up much more Korean from being in the daycare/kindergarten. The benefits of being bilingual are well documented.

I'm glad you addressed this. My wife's plan is that she'll speak to it in Korean and I can speak to it in English.

Does this sound about right?

I'm surprised to hear you say your child's first language is English! Can't imagine my wife and her conservative, non-English speaking family allowing that. I really appreciate these first hand accounts, as I have no idea how much to stand my ground.

Yeah so one parent one language is the industry standard :)

In our case my wife is pretty good at English and so she just used English more around the babies. My Korean sucks. I would say for the one parent one language model the parent that spends the most time with the kid will obviously have an advantage language wise. So for most of us dads that means working extra hard to get in the English time, obviously some dads stay at home while wife works too though and some dads are the Korean speaker, etc.
As many children of immigrants can attest to, one language will dominate like 95% of the time. Early on it may sound like they are equally talented in both languages. But when they get older, and start school, spend less, and less, time at home, the main language will take over. True fluency, completely understanding both languages, is rare.


  • JNM
  • The Legend

    • 4780

    • January 19, 2015, 10:16:48 am
    • Cairo, Egypt (formerly Seoul)
Re: Help me name my child
« Reply #44 on: March 27, 2019, 08:56:19 pm »
;D

i sent you a link for ebooks. it might also b that their son isn't such a velociracististrapt oruous eh. :huh:. reader. ;D
Thanks!


Re: Help me name my child
« Reply #45 on: March 27, 2019, 09:28:47 pm »
As many children of immigrants can attest to, one language will dominate like 95% of the time. Early on it may sound like they are equally talented in both languages. But when they get older, and start school, spend less, and less, time at home, the main language will take over. True fluency, completely understanding both languages, is rare.

Yup, am immigrant, can confirm. Started as a young adult BICS np, CALP non existent, couldn't read or write; has gotten better as I've spent the better part of the last decade educating myself in my heritage language. Now I'd say the split is closer to 80/20 for me, and perhaps closer to an even split for more minority language educated folks (eg. attending Sunday school in minority language). My family didn't put that much emphasis on minority language education and it was quite laissez faire at home. I remember vividly at 14yo waking up and realizing I was dreaming in English so I went to school that day asking all my friends what language they dreamt in.

@OP If you're looking for a more balanced bilingual child I'd argue to not even bother speaking to your child in the majority language. As pkjh said, it's practically inevitable that the majority language (local language and language at school) will take over. According to the few books I've read on the subject matter it seems to be true as well.

My wife and I plan to raise our kid in Eng environment and school so I speak Korean and she speaks Mandarin. Our kid currently knows no English and is somewhat balanced between the other two. Expecting it to change quite quickly to look more similar to pkjh's ratio after kid's attended school for 3+ years though so we try our best to keep English out of kid's environment as much as possible until school age.