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Author Topic: The hilarious things students say to you....  (Read 294197 times)

Offline bawaugh

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #560 on: October 04, 2012, 07:42:56 PM »
Today.


Teacher: I just need your brain.
Student: I have no brain.
PV=nRT

Where
P is pressure
V is volume
n is number of moles
R is the gas constant
T is the temperature

Offline TheEnergizer

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #561 on: October 04, 2012, 08:56:03 PM »
Today.


Teacher: I just need your brain.
Student: I have no brain.

LOL

Offline dash17

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #562 on: October 05, 2012, 10:26:33 AM »
Yesterday I played scattergories with my grade 2 middle school girls. Here are some of the hilarious answers I got:

Something you watch: adult movies

Hobbies: smoking

Something you do after school: f*cking

Offline Hoosier_Jedi

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #563 on: October 05, 2012, 12:13:21 PM »
Me: Do you remember where in America I'm from?
Student: Ireland!
Me:  ???

Offline bawaugh

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #564 on: October 05, 2012, 12:39:09 PM »
Student:  "Teacher, you have a tall nose!"

The student then proceeds to point out that all the students in the class have flat noses.


At least he did not say you have a long nose.
PV=nRT

Where
P is pressure
V is volume
n is number of moles
R is the gas constant
T is the temperature

Offline dachiza727

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #565 on: October 05, 2012, 12:45:55 PM »
(girls middle school, 2nd grade student)
background:  student is usually very cheerful and respectful, always tries her best in class, low-level english ability

during lunch break she comes to my room with a piece of paper:

student: Teacher... 미국 drama give me.
teacher: hmm, okay (i take the paper and write a few down that come to mind)
student: music 주세요
teacher: what kind? ballad, pop, hip hop....?
student: hip hop
teacher: okay (finish writing them down, pass paper back)
student: (pause) how about porn?
teacher: get out of my class!

"Iíll have a vanilla...one of those vanilla bullshit things. You know, whatever you want, some vanilla bullshit latte cappa thing. Whatever you got."

true dat.

Offline alyssa.callahan

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #566 on: October 05, 2012, 01:17:15 PM »
Student: Teacher, good morning!
Me: Good morning.  How are you?
Student: I am pineapple!
Me: You're a pineapple?
Student: Yes!
Me: Do you mean that you like pineapples?
Student: No, teacher, I am pineapple!
Me: Okay...

Offline Superchick3

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #567 on: October 05, 2012, 02:40:49 PM »
Teacher, you have s-line. (I had no clue what that was when my students said that)

Offline stemarty

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #568 on: October 05, 2012, 03:08:15 PM »
i drew this photo on the whiteboard and showed it to my kids during the "Giving Directions" lesson

I was explaining "it's down the street" expression.

Here is the conversation that occured between Han Null and I

Me: Ok Here I am and I want to go to the PC Bang. *Student laughter* because the PC bang is amazing!!
Han Null: OH really?!
Me: Of course! I can use this expression to explain how to find the PC Bang. I can say "The PC Bang is down the street. You can use this expression for anything. For example: My house is just down the street.
Han Null: ...you're house is the PC Bang?

Offline Songwon

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #569 on: October 05, 2012, 03:19:21 PM »
I walked into my grade one/two after-school class yesterday and was greeted with "Heyyyy, sexy lady!" by a second-grader who was also doing the Gangnam Style dance.  I don't think he actually knew what it meant...

Offline Andyroo

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #570 on: October 05, 2012, 03:22:10 PM »
Teacher, you have s-line. (I had no clue what that was when my students said that)

"Teacher Melissa has S shape. You have D shape..... but I still love you."

 :(


Offline Rhodesian

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #571 on: October 05, 2012, 03:26:17 PM »
Teacher my friend is jombie
Me: a what?
A jombie
Me: ohh- (nervous laugh) a zombie

Offline fezmond

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #572 on: October 06, 2012, 12:45:12 AM »
s: teacher he is a mother father...
me: ???
s: mother father. son of da bitch
me: oh, you mean mothe........

tried to suppress a laugh

Offline 한소로

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #573 on: October 10, 2012, 09:25:44 AM »
"Okay students, what is black, white and red all over?"
"Michael Jackson!"

Offline Chicagohotdog

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #574 on: October 10, 2012, 10:24:51 AM »
"Okay students, what is black, white and red all over?"
"Michael Jackson!"

OMG, I just started laughing outloud in our silent staff office...I had to explain the joke to my KT who explained it in Korean and made everyone laugh.  Nice!
Discount of up to $10 off of first order on iHerb.com ---> CHK096

$10 off of a Tour booked through Viator.com (You get $10 off and I'll get $10 off - that could be an airport ride): https://www.viator.com/raf/PDPOTBSYI

http://travelhacking.org/sammery-wants-you

Offline Oliv369

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #575 on: October 10, 2012, 11:52:39 AM »
I'm teaching a chapter on invitations so I start with the example sentence:

Me: "Would you like to come to my party?"
Student: "No!!!"
Me: "Oh, well fine I didn't want you there anyway..." (with exaggerated acting and melodramatic voice)
Student: "Ah, wait, no! No! Yes I want to come to your party! Yes! Yes!"

Not the most hysterical thing ever but my students and I got a good laugh out of it.

Offline Monfab

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #576 on: October 10, 2012, 01:39:18 PM »
I was teaching a private lesson to a kid in elementary school.

Me: So take a look at this picture. Who is he?
Student: He is s**t
Me: What?
Student: He is s**t boy. I am a s**t, you are a s**t, he is a s**t, she is a s**t.

On the upside at least his grammar was good....... :o
Veni, Vidi, Vici.......... but I got a little cold

Offline 한소로

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #577 on: October 10, 2012, 02:22:14 PM »
I'm sure we've all had the students who when we show pictures they are like "That is my girlfriend" "that is my house" "My grandfather"

But, today it was a little more unique. I showed a picture of Japan.

"Teacher, that is my doghouse."

Offline bawaugh

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #578 on: October 11, 2012, 12:02:11 AM »
Watched a speech competition video.


Student was asked a question and said as part of her answer:


Hitler was a great man.


Opps.  ::) :'(

PV=nRT

Where
P is pressure
V is volume
n is number of moles
R is the gas constant
T is the temperature

Offline TheEnergizer

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Re: The hilarious things students say to you....
« Reply #579 on: October 11, 2012, 08:26:07 AM »
Me: "So how was your test?"
Student: "I'm mad. Not good."
Me: "Did you study?"
Student: "...No."