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Author Topic: The hilarious things students say to you....  (Read 288964 times)

Offline Yu_Bumsuk

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #460 on: April 03, 2012, 07:23:42 PM »
Tonight in my evening HS class I was asking my students why they want to learn English. One said because she wants to marry a foreigner, especially an Australian. She's a pretty girl now and will probably be just stunning when she's 20. I felt like saying 'Your English is already good enough to bag an Aussie'.

Offline travelinpantsgirl

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #461 on: April 04, 2012, 08:05:55 AM »
Tonight in my evening HS class I was asking my students why they want to learn English. One said because she wants to marry a foreigner, especially an Australian. She's a pretty girl now and will probably be just stunning when she's 20. I felt like saying 'Your English is already good enough to bag an Aussie'.

I like her honesty! Two thumbs up for that. I say get her a Aussie slang book to help her along...haha.
Ignoranţa este adesea o boală fatal şi cretin nu poate fi vindecata.

Offline Yu_Bumsuk

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #462 on: April 04, 2012, 08:28:49 AM »
Tonight in my evening HS class I was asking my students why they want to learn English. One said because she wants to marry a foreigner, especially an Australian. She's a pretty girl now and will probably be just stunning when she's 20. I felt like saying 'Your English is already good enough to bag an Aussie'.

I like her honesty! Two thumbs up for that. I say get her a Aussie slang book to help her along...haha.

That's a great idea, actually. Maybe I could also find some Aussie TV programmes (she spend a month in Aus during MS). She seems like the type who's got all exciting about really improving English in HS. Unfortunately those types often get dragged down by the testing system and after a few months "real" English goes by the wayside.

Offline travelinpantsgirl

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #463 on: April 04, 2012, 08:38:20 AM »
Tonight in my evening HS class I was asking my students why they want to learn English. One said because she wants to marry a foreigner, especially an Australian. She's a pretty girl now and will probably be just stunning when she's 20. I felt like saying 'Your English is already good enough to bag an Aussie'.

I like her honesty! Two thumbs up for that. I say get her a Aussie slang book to help her along...haha.

That's a great idea, actually. Maybe I could also find some Aussie TV programmes (she spend a month in Aus during MS). She seems like the type who's got all exciting about really improving English in HS. Unfortunately those types often get dragged down by the testing system and after a few months "real" English goes by the wayside.

After she graduates there is nothing unethical about you introducing her to any worthy Aussie friends you may have so that she may keep that dream alive by continuing to speak real English with them as well as boning up a bit on her Aussie slang. Perhaps suggest a Aussie Uni over a Korean one (I don't know your students financial background, but I do know Oz has a little know immigration loophole that says if you go to school there for a needed field - and there are a lot to choose from- you get permanent residency  ;D)
Ignoranţa este adesea o boală fatal şi cretin nu poate fi vindecata.

Offline Yu_Bumsuk

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #464 on: April 04, 2012, 08:50:21 AM »
Tonight in my evening HS class I was asking my students why they want to learn English. One said because she wants to marry a foreigner, especially an Australian. She's a pretty girl now and will probably be just stunning when she's 20. I felt like saying 'Your English is already good enough to bag an Aussie'.

I like her honesty! Two thumbs up for that. I say get her a Aussie slang book to help her along...haha.

That's a great idea, actually. Maybe I could also find some Aussie TV programmes (she spend a month in Aus during MS). She seems like the type who's got all exciting about really improving English in HS. Unfortunately those types often get dragged down by the testing system and after a few months "real" English goes by the wayside.

After she graduates there is nothing unethical about you introducing her to any worthy Aussie friends you may have so that she may keep that dream alive by continuing to speak real English with them as well as boning up a bit on her Aussie slang. Perhaps suggest a Aussie Uni over a Korean one (I don't know your students financial background, but I do know Oz has a little know immigration loophole that says if you go to school there for a needed field - and there are a lot to choose from- you get permanent residency  ;D)

Well we'll see if it's just an adolescent pipe dream or not. She also wants to be a stewardess, so if she succeeds she'll have plenty of chances.

I have a former student who's now studying in Vancouver, who also wants to be a stewardess. She asked me what's the best way to meet ordinary Canadians. I felt like saying 'Just walk into any bar and pick out any guy you want'. If you saw her you'd know why.

Offline notinKS

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #465 on: April 10, 2012, 10:37:04 AM »
I'm working on a "bucket list" lesson this week with my middle school 1st grade students. The best one so far has been "I would like to go all over the old."

Offline Yu_Bumsuk

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #466 on: April 16, 2012, 12:37:40 PM »
"I don't recycle paper and plastic because I am a sexy girl".

She's actually quite a dork.

Offline SBracken

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #467 on: April 17, 2012, 06:47:29 AM »
Wore my hair in a single plait yesterday -> "Teacha, avatar hair!! But you no blue, very good."

Offline makeshiftb0y

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #468 on: April 19, 2012, 09:12:02 AM »
The textbook activity was to complete a chart to see how much you watch tv, use a desk lamp, etc. to see how much electricity you use and then discuss how to conserve energy. I was walking around the room to make sure students are on task and help them if needed, and I overhear this:

(One student speaking to another in a somewhat scolding, fatherly tone)

"...How can you use so much electricity? You are in school until 11pm. 11pm! Everyday! Why you use so much electricty? How? What do you do when you get home? Huh? What do you do? We need to save energy. We use too much. Tell me, what do you do? Why do you use so much?"

After walking around the room a bit, I come back to these two students. The same one is still talking, but now the other has his head down.

"...I know you like those videos, but they are bad. You cannot watch those videos anymore. If you want to live long life, stop that. I know many teenagers like those kind of videos, but they are not good."

(Student B finally chimes in) "They are good. ::giggles::"

(Back to Student A) "HEY! The earth is dying! You need to stop watching those videos. You waste too much energy. We need to save the earth..."


I was cracking up and was very impressed with his English--it might have been a little worse than what I've typed, but it was still really good.

Offline steve2398132

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #469 on: April 19, 2012, 10:06:09 AM »
Team names the students came up with during my last class:  God of Death, panda, Jong-su, and toilets   

Offline CellarDoor

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #470 on: April 26, 2012, 08:45:59 AM »
A male HS student on the first day back from a training field trip:
"I paid them money; they gave me pain."

A female HS student filling out the "date" blank on top of her worksheet:
"No... forever alone..."

Offline flasyb

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #471 on: April 26, 2012, 08:59:38 AM »
I was going through one of the "What's the Word?" warm-ups posted by Francois here. They're great and all the students try to participate and shout out the answers before their classmates. http://waygook.org/index.php/topic,26376.msg189713.html#msg189713

On one of the slides (what's the word 12 I think) there is a picture of an extended index (not middle!) finger and a picture of a nail.

Student (desperate to get the answer it): Ah, mmm, ahh... f*** you!

Another slide, same class, same game, had a picture of a hand and a picture of a bag.

Student: Hand job!

I cracked up and was doubled over laughing. Then of course the students really wanted to know what a hand job is...
In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.

We are not "guests" in Korea. Korea didn't invite us over for Pimms in the garden. We are paid employees.

Offline theTazz

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #472 on: April 26, 2012, 09:35:44 AM »
Grade 4.

Me: "How are you today?"

Boy student: "Peachy keen!"

I lol'ed.

Offline anixela

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #473 on: April 28, 2012, 10:32:45 PM »
Student: "Teacher, your nose is like Everest."

Yay?

Offline koo856

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #474 on: April 29, 2012, 08:33:31 PM »
a student saw a ring on my finger and wanted to ask if I was married.

Student: teacher! are you marry me?

other students cracked up and so did I :P

Offline ehodges33

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #475 on: April 30, 2012, 04:52:49 AM »
my first day of class after doing a powerpoint of who I am

Me: You can ask me any questions now.
Student: What's your phone number?
Me: Um...I don't have a phone yet.
Student: So what's your address?

Offline nathanpollard

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #476 on: May 07, 2012, 03:30:51 PM »
Middle school first grade lesson with 36 boys;

Me: Name something dangerous.
Pupil: Women are very dangerous.

Smart kid.

Offline travelinpantsgirl

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #477 on: May 07, 2012, 08:18:46 PM »
I have a boy student in 4th who has for reasons unknown to anyone but him (if he even knows ???) decided he's a girl. He has changed his given name to a Korean name specific to girls. This has been going on since almost the beginning of the school year...
So today this student decided to say to me "____Teacher, I love you! I'm a girl, so you know, two girls..."
 ??? ??? :o :o
I really wonder about that boy...he dresses up in girls hair bows and pony tail holders and headbands.... :-\
Ignoranţa este adesea o boală fatal şi cretin nu poate fi vindecata.

Offline genius_advice

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #478 on: May 14, 2012, 12:53:07 PM »
Student 1: Teacher! Teacher! It's . . . ?
Me: Yes? You have a question?
Student 2: IT'S SHOWTIME!
Student 1: YEAH, IT'S SHOWTIME! HAHAHA!

Offline justanotherwaygook

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Re: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute!
« Reply #479 on: May 23, 2012, 02:10:46 PM »
Today, during a bomb game, we had a review slide.  It was a gif of Family Guy characters vomiting.  We had previously learned the phrase using the same gif.

The answer was supposed to be:

"They're nauseous."

The student's answer:

"They're religious!"
C is for cookie, that's good enough for me.