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Author Topic: Why is Korea so stressful?  (Read 15947 times)

Online CO2

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #160 on: December 29, 2018, 04:00:03 PM »
"yes, but at least you have clean water to drink and don't have to worry about being killed by rebel militia like in some african countries"

 :cry: I have cancer......

 :shocked: Aha, but you only have ONE type of cancer! Cheer up!
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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #161 on: December 29, 2018, 07:49:03 PM »
I've found the answer.

It's because most Koreans have never been taught basic manners.


This is what makes it so hard for the average westerner to enjoy day-to-day interactions with them. Because they are always doing something rude or offensive, then either act oblivious or like they're the victim when they get it back.
Oh please. There's rude people everywhere and if you find something where Koreans are commonly rude (i.e. public transport/driving) you find stuff where westerners are rude (attention seeking behavior, PDAs, graffiti, street crime)

Once again, there's an old saying- If you run into an asshole when you start your day, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day long, YOU'RE THE ASSHOLE. This holds true in any country or any neighborhood.

A couple of months ago i was out shopping and on 4 occasions i came to a glass door and there was someone coming towards me for the other side.  On all 4 occasions, i let the person coming towards me come through first.  Only the fourth occasion was the door held open for me (by a person who was an employee, not the customer), the others let it shut in my face....... I was pushing a baby in a buggy!

Does that make me an ARSEHOLE?

Online some waygug-in

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #162 on: December 29, 2018, 09:56:29 PM »
The irony in this thread is so thick and heavy
I could iron my shorts with it.

Online VanIslander

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #163 on: December 29, 2018, 11:30:47 PM »
The irony in this thread is so thick and heavy
I could iron my shorts with it.
1. Korean men don't wear shorts.
2. Complaining about stress is not the same as experiencing stress.
3. Korea has MUCH MORE stomach cancer than fatties in America and Canada. Huh. Is that irony?
4. I have yet to meet anyone who spent significant time in Japan or China to gripe about stress or any difficulty in South Korea.

Online Mr C

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #164 on: December 30, 2018, 01:08:55 AM »
In general, I don't find living in Korea to be stressful at all.  I have been here since 2008.

There is one area of stress for me, though, and it occurs every year around re-contracting time.  On paper, of course, I am a shoo-in for renewal, as I am--not to toot my own horn--a very competent teacher with a strong work ethic, able to negotiate the co-worker/boss relationships pretty well, and prefer to go to a baseball game with my friends rather than a room salon.

Still, there is this nagging doubt every year--especially after the Gangnam fiasco of 2010(?) and the on-again, off-again love affair with English education--sometime around May, that this might be the year.  It isn't really me-specific, though I am older and portlier than the typical NET.

I taught in the States for over twenty years, and only at two schools (so that shows I can hold a job back home).  I came to Korea for only one or two years, but found I loved it here: yes, for the experiences, culture, travel, etc, but also for the low stress working environment.  To wit:

-in 10+ years I have never ever ever even once spent a half-hour on the phone with a whining parent.
-I do not grade papers or write tests (except speaking tests, sometimes). Grading papers was the bane of my existence for 22 years.
-I walk out the door at 4:29 and never ever ever ever do schoolwork at home (unless I have an idea that I really want to get onto!)
-I never have to put in a showing at extracurricular sports events, school concerts, etc. outside school hours.  They just don't have them, at least not at the four schools I've taught at. What they do have is in working hours.
-the students are as well-behaved and respectful as I ever had back home.
-I do five preps now, did two or three when I taught high school, did 10 or more when I taught at home.  I also coached, was state soccer administrator, Region Literary Chair, school webmaster and eventually ascended to Athletic Director at my school. It is literally the case that I didn't leave work until 7 or later, 10 or so on a game day.  As I said, I walk out at 4:30 in Korea.
-Wow! You must have made a lot of money with all that extra work, I hear you say.  Weeeell, not so much.  Eventually, I wasn't living paycheck-to-paycheck, but in terms of disposable income I am doing somewhat better as an ELT for SMOE.
-part of that is awesome public transport, good quality, inexpensive health insurance and healthcare, and great amenities, at least in Seoul.
-Incidentally, if I do feel stress at work, I just look at my computer's desktop picture, which is a photo of a beach I stayed at in Koh Phangan, or Koh Samui, or Otres. 
-Last summer, my nephew took his wife and kids to Ft Lauderdale, a well-known Florida beach location, where they spent three days in a nice two bedroom suite in a high-rise on the super-crowded beach. The accommodation alone was $1400 or so.  I'm leaving on NYD for about two weeks on a quiet beach on Koh Chang in Thailand, which will cost me about that much for food, drinks, beachfront bungalow and airfare! Hopefully a Thai massage or two will help soothe away all this stress from living in Korea.

Online some waygug-in

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #165 on: December 30, 2018, 02:59:07 AM »
The irony in this thread is so thick and heavy
I could iron my shorts with it.
1. Korean men don't wear shorts.
2. Complaining about stress is not the same as experiencing stress.
3. Korea has MUCH MORE stomach cancer than fatties in America and Canada. Huh. Is that irony?
4. I have yet to meet anyone who spent significant time in Japan or China to gripe about stress or any difficulty in South Korea.
Ha ha
You' re on to me.
Chinese Laundry workers do fear irony.
And now I've soiled my shorts. 😖
Oh, the stress!
Fat Canadians or none.
« Last Edit: December 30, 2018, 04:39:59 AM by some waygug-in »

Online eggieguffer

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #166 on: December 30, 2018, 08:00:59 AM »
Stress from the place I live in would normally be connected to transport. E.g not being able to afford to live in London and having to stand on a regional train, that was often late, for for 2 hours every day. Here my commute is 20 mins and I usually get a seat. In the old days when I used to go drinking/clubbing in Seoul, trying to get a taxi home at the weekend was kind of stressful. In my experience, real stress nearly always comes from work, usually an obnoxious boss.

Offline gogators!

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #167 on: December 31, 2018, 01:49:18 AM »
In general, I don't find living in Korea to be stressful at all.  I have been here since 2008.

There is one area of stress for me, though, and it occurs every year around re-contracting time.  On paper, of course, I am a shoo-in for renewal, as I am--not to toot my own horn--a very competent teacher with a strong work ethic, able to negotiate the co-worker/boss relationships pretty well, and prefer to go to a baseball game with my friends rather than a room salon.

Still, there is this nagging doubt every year--especially after the Gangnam fiasco of 2010(?) and the on-again, off-again love affair with English education--sometime around May, that this might be the year.  It isn't really me-specific, though I am older and portlier than the typical NET.

I taught in the States for over twenty years, and only at two schools (so that shows I can hold a job back home).  I came to Korea for only one or two years, but found I loved it here: yes, for the experiences, culture, travel, etc, but also for the low stress working environment.  To wit:

-in 10+ years I have never ever ever even once spent a half-hour on the phone with a whining parent.
-I do not grade papers or write tests (except speaking tests, sometimes). Grading papers was the bane of my existence for 22 years.
-I walk out the door at 4:29 and never ever ever ever do schoolwork at home (unless I have an idea that I really want to get onto!)
-I never have to put in a showing at extracurricular sports events, school concerts, etc. outside school hours.  They just don't have them, at least not at the four schools I've taught at. What they do have is in working hours.
-the students are as well-behaved and respectful as I ever had back home.
-I do five preps now, did two or three when I taught high school, did 10 or more when I taught at home.  I also coached, was state soccer administrator, Region Literary Chair, school webmaster and eventually ascended to Athletic Director at my school. It is literally the case that I didn't leave work until 7 or later, 10 or so on a game day.  As I said, I walk out at 4:30 in Korea.
-Wow! You must have made a lot of money with all that extra work, I hear you say.  Weeeell, not so much.  Eventually, I wasn't living paycheck-to-paycheck, but in terms of disposable income I am doing somewhat better as an ELT for SMOE.
-part of that is awesome public transport, good quality, inexpensive health insurance and healthcare, and great amenities, at least in Seoul.
-Incidentally, if I do feel stress at work, I just look at my computer's desktop picture, which is a photo of a beach I stayed at in Koh Phangan, or Koh Samui, or Otres. 
-Last summer, my nephew took his wife and kids to Ft Lauderdale, a well-known Florida beach location, where they spent three days in a nice two bedroom suite in a high-rise on the super-crowded beach. The accommodation alone was $1400 or so.  I'm leaving on NYD for about two weeks on a quiet beach on Koh Chang in Thailand, which will cost me about that much for food, drinks, beachfront bungalow and airfare! Hopefully a Thai massage or two will help soothe away all this stress from living in Korea.
How about job satisfaction?

It sounds like you were making a large positive impact on students and their lives back in the US. How about in Korea?

Offline CypherSoul

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #168 on: December 31, 2018, 09:12:45 AM »
Stress from the place I live in would normally be connected to transport. E.g not being able to afford to live in London and having to stand on a regional train, that was often late, for for 2 hours every day.

Definitely don't miss London for that!  ;D Too expensive and too busy as well! The tube was a nightmare!
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Offline alexisalex

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #169 on: December 31, 2018, 09:42:51 AM »
The stress in my life here comes from noise.  That's it.

I have a really simple goal in life.  To be able to go home at the end of the day, shut my door (house, apartment, whatever) and not hear noise from other people.  It's that simple.  I think I'd be the happiest man in Korea if I could guarantee that  :laugh:

Sadly, I don't think that's possible here.  I've never experienced so much "avoidable"* noise as I have since living in Korea.  It could be building construction but I honestly think there's an aspect of people just not being considerate at all towards others.   

*"Avoidable" noise is noise that shouldn't happen.  Stomp-walking, slamming doors, slamming cupboard doors, shout-talking, screaming inside, blaringly loud TVs/music etc...

Online eggieguffer

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #170 on: December 31, 2018, 10:45:59 AM »
The stress in my life here comes from noise.  That's it.

I have a really simple goal in life.  To be able to go home at the end of the day, shut my door (house, apartment, whatever) and not hear noise from other people.  It's that simple.  I think I'd be the happiest man in Korea if I could guarantee that  :laugh:

Sadly, I don't think that's possible here.  I've never experienced so much "avoidable"* noise as I have since living in Korea.  It could be building construction but I honestly think there's an aspect of people just not being considerate at all towards others.   

*"Avoidable" noise is noise that shouldn't happen.  Stomp-walking, slamming doors, slamming cupboard doors, shout-talking, screaming inside, blaringly loud TVs/music etc...

Simple, get a decent apartment. If it means that much to you. Where I live is like a morgue.
« Last Edit: December 31, 2018, 10:50:37 AM by eggieguffer »

Online PatrickBateman

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #171 on: December 31, 2018, 10:54:11 AM »
Peoples blatant disregard for thinking.  The selfishness is palpable.  Yesterday at the gym..   I'm in the squat rack doing my business.  I have 2-45 plates and a 25 plate on each side.  I'm on like my 4th set and stretching while between sets right under the loaded bar.   Some dopey, selfish, piss smelling 50ish something adjosshi decides it would be a great idea to take a 25 plate off one side while I'm not looking so he could use it as if I didn't need it.  I go to do a set and unrack and the misbalance makes me nearly dump the weight..   I re-rack and look at the adjosshi and he is just looking back at me like "whatever you waygookin shitbag".  I give him a death stare until he cowards off.

This is just one example of the type of chit that makes me stressed and ready to snap.  I can easily not give crap about most selfish things but this type of thing makes me rage.  I'm putting my exit plan into high gear.  Fook this place.

Plus its -5c out and as I sit in a coffee shop, people have walked in and not closed the door behind them 3 times in 1 hour.  I keeping seeing postings about Korean having the highest IQ and they're so smart.  Give me a break.

Online Savant

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #172 on: December 31, 2018, 11:07:41 AM »
Stress from the place I live in would normally be connected to transport. E.g not being able to afford to live in London and having to stand on a regional train, that was often late, for for 2 hours every day. Here my commute is 20 mins and I usually get a seat. In the old days when I used to go drinking/clubbing in Seoul, trying to get a taxi home at the weekend was kind of stressful. In my experience, real stress nearly always comes from work, usually an obnoxious boss.

Never got stressed using public transport in the UK. Sure, I got pissed off at train cancellations and delays but never stressed.

Stress is taking the Korean subway during peak hours. Stress is trying to get past a Korean standing on the wrong side of the elevator as you see your train approaching the station. Stress is taking one of those taxis with a driver who thinks he's in F1 trying to make up positions on the last lap.

I have been happier taking express buses in Korea; only due to limiting the space to seated only. The days when everyone was packed in, including standing, was stressful.

Offline alexisalex

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #173 on: December 31, 2018, 11:08:34 AM »
The stress in my life here comes from noise.  That's it.

I have a really simple goal in life.  To be able to go home at the end of the day, shut my door (house, apartment, whatever) and not hear noise from other people.  It's that simple.  I think I'd be the happiest man in Korea if I could guarantee that  :laugh:

Sadly, I don't think that's possible here.  I've never experienced so much "avoidable"* noise as I have since living in Korea.  It could be building construction but I honestly think there's an aspect of people just not being considerate at all towards others.   

*"Avoidable" noise is noise that shouldn't happen.  Stomp-walking, slamming doors, slamming cupboard doors, shout-talking, screaming inside, blaringly loud TVs/music etc...

Simple, get a decent apartment. If it means that much to you. Where I live is like a morgue.

Lol it's that simple isn't it? Just get a decent apartment.  Why didn't I think of that.

Offline tylerthegloob

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #174 on: December 31, 2018, 11:19:56 AM »
The stress in my life here comes from noise.  That's it.

I have a really simple goal in life.  To be able to go home at the end of the day, shut my door (house, apartment, whatever) and not hear noise from other people.  It's that simple.  I think I'd be the happiest man in Korea if I could guarantee that  :laugh:

Sadly, I don't think that's possible here.  I've never experienced so much "avoidable"* noise as I have since living in Korea.  It could be building construction but I honestly think there's an aspect of people just not being considerate at all towards others.   

*"Avoidable" noise is noise that shouldn't happen.  Stomp-walking, slamming doors, slamming cupboard doors, shout-talking, screaming inside, blaringly loud TVs/music etc...

Simple, get a decent apartment. If it means that much to you. Where I live is like a morgue.

Lol it's that simple isn't it? Just get a decent apartment.  Why didn't I think of that.

Yeah, for what it's worth, I never hear my neighbors. I've heard my immediate neighbor two times since I've moved in. I heard my upstairs neighbors pretty regularly in the beginning, but now I only hear them once in a blue moon.

Online eggieguffer

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #175 on: December 31, 2018, 11:20:25 AM »
The stress in my life here comes from noise.  That's it.

I have a really simple goal in life.  To be able to go home at the end of the day, shut my door (house, apartment, whatever) and not hear noise from other people.  It's that simple.  I think I'd be the happiest man in Korea if I could guarantee that  :laugh:

Sadly, I don't think that's possible here.  I've never experienced so much "avoidable"* noise as I have since living in Korea.  It could be building construction but I honestly think there's an aspect of people just not being considerate at all towards others.   

*"Avoidable" noise is noise that shouldn't happen.  Stomp-walking, slamming doors, slamming cupboard doors, shout-talking, screaming inside, blaringly loud TVs/music etc...

Simple, get a decent apartment. If it means that much to you. Where I live is like a morgue.

Lol it's that simple isn't it? Just get a decent apartment.  Why didn't I think of that.

Maybe because if you don't live in a decent apartment you might think they all have sound-proofing like yours. In fact they don't

Offline sh9wntm

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #176 on: December 31, 2018, 11:26:26 AM »
Peoples blatant disregard for thinking.  The selfishness is palpable.  Yesterday at the gym..   I'm in the squat rack doing my business.  I have 2-45 plates and a 25 plate on each side.  I'm on like my 4th set and stretching while between sets right under the loaded bar.   Some dopey, selfish, piss smelling 50ish something adjosshi decides it would be a great idea to take a 25 plate off one side while I'm not looking so he could use it as if I didn't need it.  I go to do a set and unrack and the misbalance makes me nearly dump the weight..   I re-rack and look at the adjosshi and he is just looking back at me like "whatever you waygookin shitbag".  I give him a death stare until he cowards off.

This is just one example of the type of chit that makes me stressed and ready to snap.  I can easily not give crap about most selfish things but this type of thing makes me rage.  I'm putting my exit plan into high gear.  Fook this place.

Plus its -5c out and as I sit in a coffee shop, people have walked in and not closed the door behind them 3 times in 1 hour.  I keeping seeing postings about Korean having the highest IQ and they're so smart.  Give me a break.

Sheesh... Yah gym etiquette is another thing that rubs me wrong. Even something simple like re-racking the weights for the next person is never ever considered.

Outside of shallow gestures of Confucian respect for people within your circle, the average individual is completely self-absorbed when it comes to the public sphere. Especially those with an extra sense of entitlement (ajoessis and ajummas).

Offline alexisalex

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #177 on: December 31, 2018, 11:33:32 AM »
The stress in my life here comes from noise.  That's it.

I have a really simple goal in life.  To be able to go home at the end of the day, shut my door (house, apartment, whatever) and not hear noise from other people.  It's that simple.  I think I'd be the happiest man in Korea if I could guarantee that  :laugh:

Sadly, I don't think that's possible here.  I've never experienced so much "avoidable"* noise as I have since living in Korea.  It could be building construction but I honestly think there's an aspect of people just not being considerate at all towards others.   

*"Avoidable" noise is noise that shouldn't happen.  Stomp-walking, slamming doors, slamming cupboard doors, shout-talking, screaming inside, blaringly loud TVs/music etc...

Simple, get a decent apartment. If it means that much to you. Where I live is like a morgue.

Lol it's that simple isn't it? Just get a decent apartment.  Why didn't I think of that.

Yeah, for what it's worth, I never hear my neighbors. I've heard my immediate neighbor two times since I've moved in. I heard my upstairs neighbors pretty regularly in the beginning, but now I only hear them once in a blue moon.

Yeah that's my point.  You don't hear your upstairs neighbours because they don't make any noise.  Nothing to do with the apartment itself.

Maybe because if you don't live in a decent apartment you might think they all have sound-proofing like yours. In fact they don't

How do you find these morgue-like apartments?  Are you sure it's not because you've lucked out and have neighbours who don't make any noise?

Online eggieguffer

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #178 on: December 31, 2018, 11:47:50 AM »
The stress in my life here comes from noise.  That's it.

I have a really simple goal in life.  To be able to go home at the end of the day, shut my door (house, apartment, whatever) and not hear noise from other people.  It's that simple.  I think I'd be the happiest man in Korea if I could guarantee that  :laugh:

Sadly, I don't think that's possible here.  I've never experienced so much "avoidable"* noise as I have since living in Korea.  It could be building construction but I honestly think there's an aspect of people just not being considerate at all towards others.   

*"Avoidable" noise is noise that shouldn't happen.  Stomp-walking, slamming doors, slamming cupboard doors, shout-talking, screaming inside, blaringly loud TVs/music etc...

Simple, get a decent apartment. If it means that much to you. Where I live is like a morgue.

Lol it's that simple isn't it? Just get a decent apartment.  Why didn't I think of that.

Yeah, for what it's worth, I never hear my neighbors. I've heard my immediate neighbor two times since I've moved in. I heard my upstairs neighbors pretty regularly in the beginning, but now I only hear them once in a blue moon.

Yeah that's my point.  You don't hear your upstairs neighbours because they don't make any noise.  Nothing to do with the apartment itself.

Maybe because if you don't live in a decent apartment you might think they all have sound-proofing like yours. In fact they don't

How do you find these morgue-like apartments?  Are you sure it's not because you've lucked out and have neighbours who don't make any noise?

Yeah, I could have, I wouldn't know. Except when people who live in badly sound proofed apartments complain they say they can hear the TV from the other flat or people going to the toilet/having sex. I'm pretty sure my neighbours have done all those things at some point but I've never heard it. Also we have a three year old and my wife has often asked the people below us in the lift if he's bothering them but they've never said yes.

Offline JVPrice

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Re: Why is Korea so stressful?
« Reply #179 on: December 31, 2018, 12:09:54 PM »
Answering the topic, I really think it all comes down to you. No one can be blamed if they're stressed by scary taxi drivers and Korean Surprises, but I really think everything else is up to however you handle living here.
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