Lunch tray problem

[suncheonerin]

I don't know if this is the best place to put this question! I'm sorry if I've posted in the wrong spot

I've been here for a couple of months and what I had originally thought was just a curiousity thing has started to take on a life of its own! I find that when I sit down to eat in the cafeteria no more than 5 seconds goes by before one of my Korean colleagues is searching out one of my co-teachers to ask why I haven't taken something from the buffet. I'm a vegetarian so it's not that I'm being picky (I take and eat kimchi even though I don't like it). Even if I was being picky, I don't really feel comfortable having my food scrutinised. I would much rather eat in the cafeteria than in my office my by myself. Does anyone have advice on how to handle this while being sensitive? I try to emphasize that I do like Korean food but after a couple of months I'm finding the commentary on my lunch tray to be a little much. I hope I'm not being overly sensitive!

[Brian]

I taught in Korea for four years and it always irritated me, too.

If I took something, it was commentary on how much I liked it or how well I could eat Korean food.

If I didn't take something, it was commentary on how I couldn't eat Korean food.  Not only do they talk about you in English, but they talk about you in Korean as well.

One day I was feeling sick and wasn't up for fish with fish soup and kimchi---since that DOES comprise practically every meal, and isn't so easy on the stomach---so I just ate rice and broth.  My coteacher concluded that foreigners couldn't eat kimchi, even though I had eaten in that cafeteria loads of times and had been in Korea for a lot longer. 

Food nationalism is just something you deal with in Korea, and as you may or may not have noticed, all textbooks have a chapter on how spicy Korean food is and how foreigners have a hell of a time with it (or can't use chopsticks).  Even in Korean-language books, for foreigners learning Korean, the example sentences often revolve around food difficulties. 

At times when I wasn't in the mood I just skipped lunch, brought my own, or went to the kimbap shop across the street.  When I did eat in the cafeteria and the commentary became too much, I just ignored it.  Trying to explain yourself to Korean-speakers can be tough, and can feel a lot like Groundhog Day, because it'll just come up again the next day. 

Try mentioning to your co-teacher how you feel, too.  Make sure she knows you're a vegetarian, and maybe say that you're trying to adjust to Korea but constant attention is making it difficult at times. 

[wattawoman]

I've been here two years and I just nod and smile and say "OK!"  They think I'm sweet.

Try not to let it bother you.  Every day the sun comes up and goes down and a Korean will make a comment about your eating habits.  Try asking them if they eat spicy food well or if they like Korean food.  It will make them laugh.

[bleakronnie]

They probably don't think they are scrutinizing you, they are just showing interest. A lot of Koreans are very proud of their unique cuisine, and I think they should be.
More often that not, if they are questioning what you are or aren't eating, it's because they care for your health and well-being. That's just the way they show they care.
Try nodding and smiling and maybe just saying 'I love rice, I think it's the most important part of the meal'. See how that goes.

[hampyeong]

Tell them, "It hurts my stomach".

I was having stomach problems (pains in my abdomen after meals) from eating red pepper (kimchi, mainly) every meal for 2 months straight, so finally I decided to go on a kimchi-free diet. I told my co-teacher about my stomach pains and how I think it is from spicy food, and she explained it to the rest of the teachers. At first it was a legitimate excuse to not eat certain spicy food but now I use it as excuse for foods that I simply don't like (fish and seaweed soup, mainly).

Them: Why don't you eat _____? (they don't speak English, so they just point at the item on their plate and then point to the empty space on my plate and use broken english to get the question across)
Me: It hurts my stomach. (or, just point to my stomach and say 'stomach ache' with a pained look on my face)


Now they don't even ask.