December 12, 2017, 06:34:22 AM

Author Topic: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.  (Read 7207 times)

Offline Pecan

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #80 on: October 12, 2017, 08:56:05 PM »
This tale being spun by the OP sounds like the "cancer con" aka "the sick buffalo" scam.

Offline Epistemology

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #81 on: October 12, 2017, 09:16:21 PM »
You thought of them as family when you loaned the money and your trust was betrayed.
I appreciate that there are all "kinds" in this world, but you aren't being serious with the above, are you?

Quote
Loaning money to a friend or family member is a bad decision. Someone who lends money to a loved one has their heart—not their head—in the right place. ... 57% of people said they have seen a friendship or relationship ruined because one person didn't pay back the other.

Quote
If you're thinking about lending money to family, know that it will likely never be repaid in full.

It is "common" knowledge and every mouth breather on the planet knows the potential outcome.

https://www.moneytalksnews.com/tired-loaning-money-friends-and-family-heres-how-stop/

That said, cancer?  The mother is died, but the OP wishes to transfer the debt onto the daughter...that just isn't right, on so many levels.

You know that expression "What goes around comes around"?

It sounds like the OP is reaping what he has sown.

All very trite and cliche, but when one craps in their own bed...things tend to get $hitty.

And this folks is exactly why no one likes a vegan.
Away an bile yer heid ya numpty,ye dinnae ken whit yer talkin aboot.

Offline Teachersa

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #82 on: October 12, 2017, 09:30:53 PM »
No one has mentioned the car.

OP, did you pay for the entire car or did you give the down payment. Perhaps you can recoup some of the money she owes you if she sells the car.
Maybe talk about a repayment plan.

You should probably talk about this ASAP as when you leave Korea it might be too difficult to enforce a payment plan.

I'm not sure you will be able to get all the money back. She might be tapped out if she also put money towards her mother's cancer treatment. Unless she has a great job or 25 million in savings already...

You should also look at the tax implications of receiving 25 million won as the Korean Tax office might think you've come into the money in a strange way when you remit it back to your home country.

Offline hangook77

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #83 on: October 12, 2017, 09:47:27 PM »
My Chuseok absolutely sucked. I found out that my partner (wife, essentially) has been seeing another man. I'd only been in this country to be with her, so after this contract I will probably leave Korea and shake the dust from my shoes never to return. Thing is, over the past two years I have loaned her 25,000,000 won for her mother's mounting medical bills and her new car. I intend on getting that back before I leave Korea. If she doesn't do the right thing and cough it over voluntarily, what are my legal options?

Has anyone sued an ex-partner here for monies owed? Can you recommend a lawyer who is competent and can speak English? Hopefully it won't come to this, but I need to be prepared.

Thanks,

Mac

Sorry Mac, you've been had.  It sucks.  But short of a legal contract, you're out of luck.  I hope you can move on with your life and meet someone else.  You got to cut your losses. 

Offline Cyanea

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #84 on: October 13, 2017, 12:48:38 AM »
This is not the time for yet another obnoxious and confrontational post of yours. Please stop.

Martino has a habit of attacking people when they're down. Seems to be a korean tendency that if you see someone suffering, you go all out to finish them off. No empathy.

Quote from: Epistemology
Asking you to loan money to her mother while she was cheating on you


Hold on, you don't know that. He said the money was loaned a year ago. ie probably before she was unfaithful. Don't be so quick to paint her as some sort of evil femme fatale, you don't know the details.

Sorry Mac, you've been had.

Hold on there. I wouldn't assume she was a calculated cold-blooded deciever. People don't usually plan these things, they just happen. Not making excuses but its not always that easy for people to stay faithful, everyone is human. The opposite sex is not some sort of predator out to get you: men slip up as well.

 

Catch my drift?

Offline Pecan

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #85 on: October 13, 2017, 05:50:16 AM »
not always that easy for people to stay faithful, everyone is human. The opposite sex...slip up as well.
Thanks for the visual :)

"Sorry, Honey.  I slipped and fell into her vagina."

Cyanea,

Monogamy might not be natural for humans, but it most certainly is easy, much easier than "cheating" on your partner.

Offline yirj17

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #86 on: October 13, 2017, 07:38:10 AM »
Sorry Mac, you've been had.

Hold on there. I wouldn't assume she was a calculated cold-blooded deciever. People don't usually plan these things, they just happen. Not making excuses but its not always that easy for people to stay faithful, everyone is human. The opposite sex is not some sort of predator out to get you: men slip up as well.

Absolute rubbish.  Affairs don't "just happen."  Anyone who says that just doesn't want to take responsibility for their actions. 

Offline Pecan

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #87 on: October 13, 2017, 07:56:09 AM »
Sorry Mac, you've been had.

Hold on there. I wouldn't assume she was a calculated cold-blooded deciever. People don't usually plan these things, they just happen. Not making excuses but its not always that easy for people to stay faithful, everyone is human. The opposite sex is not some sort of predator out to get you: men slip up as well.

Absolute rubbish.  Affairs don't "just happen."  Anyone who says that just doesn't want to take responsibility for their actions.
+1

Offline Epistemology

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #88 on: October 13, 2017, 07:59:08 AM »

Hold on, you don't know that. He said the money was loaned a year ago. ie probably before she was unfaithful. Don't be so quick to paint her as some sort of evil femme fatale, you don't know the details.


Who said I was?  Besides, the alternative is worse. You completely missed the point anyway. Any wrong she did towards the OP is not fixed by wronging her by making her responsible for her deceased parent's debt. She could be an angel. She could be a devil, I'm not judging. However, the recipient of the loan is dead and  the money should, for all intents and purposes, be considered noncollectable. If not for legal reasons, then at least for moral ones.

The only avenue that is open to him is collecting some money from the sale of the car, but for that he and she have to be civil to each other.
Away an bile yer heid ya numpty,ye dinnae ken whit yer talkin aboot.

Online sligo

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #89 on: October 13, 2017, 08:10:41 AM »

Hold on, you don't know that. He said the money was loaned a year ago. ie probably before she was unfaithful. Don't be so quick to paint her as some sort of evil femme fatale, you don't know the details.


Who said I was?  Besides, the alternative is worse. You completely missed the point anyway. Any wrong she did towards the OP is not fixed by wronging her by making her responsible for her deceased parent's debt. She could be an angel. She could be a devil, I'm not judging. However, the recipient of the loan is dead and  the money should, for all intents and purposes, be considered noncollectable. If not for legal reasons, then at least for moral ones.

The only avenue that is open to him is collecting some money from the sale of the car, but for that he and she have to be civil to each other.

Please read the OP again.  He never said he loaned anything to the mother.  He loaned the money to his girlfriend to be used for the mother's bills.  That is a very different position.  If the transfer went to the girlfriend's account, then that is who the loanee was.  Whatever happens to te money after that is irrelevant.

Offline cjszk

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #90 on: October 13, 2017, 08:26:08 AM »

Hold on, you don't know that. He said the money was loaned a year ago. ie probably before she was unfaithful. Don't be so quick to paint her as some sort of evil femme fatale, you don't know the details.


Who said I was?  Besides, the alternative is worse. You completely missed the point anyway. Any wrong she did towards the OP is not fixed by wronging her by making her responsible for her deceased parent's debt. She could be an angel. She could be a devil, I'm not judging. However, the recipient of the loan is dead and  the money should, for all intents and purposes, be considered noncollectable. If not for legal reasons, then at least for moral ones.

The only avenue that is open to him is collecting some money from the sale of the car, but for that he and she have to be civil to each other.

Please read the OP again.  He never said he loaned anything to the mother.  He loaned the money to his girlfriend to be used for the mother's bills.  That is a very different position.  If the transfer went to the girlfriend's account, then that is who the loanee was.  Whatever happens to te money after that is irrelevant.
Given this point of view it becomes more suspicious as to whether or not all of the money was used for her mother.

Offline Pecan

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #91 on: October 13, 2017, 08:29:06 AM »
However, the recipient of the loan is dead and  the money should, for all intents and purposes, be considered noncollectable. If not for legal reasons, then at least for moral ones.
Epi,

Do Koreans have legal "estates" to handle the debts of the deceased (I know some things are quite different here, as spouses and children are responsible for the debt of their deceased parents/spouse, etc., where that is NOT the case in the US)?

Surely, the mother had property and monies.

Upon her death, he could have made a lien/a claim against her estate.

Offline Epistemology

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #92 on: October 13, 2017, 08:45:16 AM »

Hold on, you don't know that. He said the money was loaned a year ago. ie probably before she was unfaithful. Don't be so quick to paint her as some sort of evil femme fatale, you don't know the details.


Who said I was?  Besides, the alternative is worse. You completely missed the point anyway. Any wrong she did towards the OP is not fixed by wronging her by making her responsible for her deceased parent's debt. She could be an angel. She could be a devil, I'm not judging. However, the recipient of the loan is dead and  the money should, for all intents and purposes, be considered noncollectable. If not for legal reasons, then at least for moral ones.

The only avenue that is open to him is collecting some money from the sale of the car, but for that he and she have to be civil to each other.

Please read the OP again.  He never said he loaned anything to the mother.  He loaned the money to his girlfriend to be used for the mother's bills.  That is a very different position.  If the transfer went to the girlfriend's account, then that is who the loanee was.  Whatever happens to te money after that is irrelevant.

Legally? Yes. Morally? No.
There was an understanding that the money was specifically for her mother. He saw them as family, as he has stated many times throughout this thread.

However, the recipient of the loan is dead and  the money should, for all intents and purposes, be considered noncollectable. If not for legal reasons, then at least for moral ones.
Epi,

Do Koreans have legal "estates" to handle the debts of the deceased (I know some things are quite different here, as spouses and children are responsible for the debt of their deceased parents/spouse, etc., where that is NOT the case in the US)?

Surely, the mother had property and monies.

Upon her death, he could have made a lien/a claim against her estate.


Perhaps, though I would hazard that the father is still living in the primary property and it would be a helluva douchebaggy thing to potentially make him homeless in a quest to get back some money, especially if the OP claimed to have saw him as family (and he is innocent of the sins of his daughter).

if they are having to borrow money off of a foreigner though, I would imagine that any money saved had already been spent on financing the cancer treatment. It would be worth trying to check the will out and seeing if theres anything asset wise going to the daughter that could be claimed against
Away an bile yer heid ya numpty,ye dinnae ken whit yer talkin aboot.

Offline Pecan

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #93 on: October 13, 2017, 08:58:00 AM »
if they are having to borrow money off of a foreigner though
I hear you.

I didn't look at in that way, as I mentioned, I thought this might simply be a version of the "sick buffalo" scam that often happens in Asia to foreigner men who are seeking female companionship.

Offline Teachersa

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #94 on: October 13, 2017, 09:30:47 AM »
I wonder if OP was actually seen as in a serious relationship with the gf and not just a “friend who speaks English”. Sounds like the girlfriend confessed to another relationship and broke up with him. I know a few men and women who’ve discovered their Korean partners are getting married to someone else because they didn’t expect to get married to the foreigner or he didn’t settle down soon enough for her... 12 years together. I don’t know many Koreans who would stay unmarried for that amount of time.
Is there another man? Maybe the girlfriend is using this story to get him to marry her?

Offline Pattinsons

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #95 on: October 13, 2017, 10:23:57 AM »
I empathize with the OP.

The best advice was to check the legal Facebook forums. And stop reading this thread OP. I don’t think you are in a good place, and the comments probably aren’t helping.

Offline Mr.DeMartino

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #96 on: October 13, 2017, 10:42:33 AM »
Martino has a habit of attacking people when they're down. Seems to be a korean tendency that if you see someone suffering, you go all out to finish them off. No empathy.

Dude, people on this thread started calling the guy a bunch of things and laughing at him for getting cheated on. I never mentioned that and I think it's messed up to make fun of him for that.

During all those comments you never made it racial/ethnic. Now you do.

What's your problem? Can you only see stuff as racial?

Online sligo

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #97 on: October 13, 2017, 11:41:40 AM »
Martino has a habit of attacking people when they're down. Seems to be a korean tendency that if you see someone suffering, you go all out to finish them off. No empathy.

Dude, people on this thread started calling the guy a bunch of things and laughing at him for getting cheated on. I never mentioned that and I think it's messed up to make fun of him for that.

During all those comments you never made it racial/ethnic. Now you do.

What's your problem? Can you only see stuff as racial?


Hey kettle, the pot just called you a grimy arse!

Offline msession1992

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #98 on: October 13, 2017, 02:12:01 PM »
I am so sorry this happened to you. I think a Facebook group that focuses on legal action in Korea may be the best option. But you should try something. Don't give up so easily. Good luck!

Offline internationalteacher

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Re: Legal advice needed: suing ex-girlfriend for money owed.
« Reply #99 on: October 13, 2017, 11:02:01 PM »
to me the OP made financial "gifts" so her mother could undertake cancer treatment.
In the UK a gift is not a loan and is not usually recoverable but IDK about Korea.

Also her mother could have got cancer treatment from the Korean health system so why did he need to fund it privately? And where did he get 25m won from if he is an ESL teacher? Just curious/nosey really but he gifted the money and therefore I dont think it is recoverable.

I would not give money to my GF/wife's mother but that's just me unless it was a small amount of money for something she needed. Not medical treatment though.