November 22, 2017, 11:53:28 AM

Author Topic: What job ads really mean.  (Read 1401 times)

Offline Aurata

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What job ads really mean.
« on: January 11, 2017, 08:45:29 PM »
Just thought I'd help newbies to decipher the reality behind all that cutesy terminology that recruiters tend to use.


Quote
"We are looking for energetic teachers"

= you will need superhuman energy to get through the long hours and insane workload we will throw at you.

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Salary: negotiable dependent on qualifications and experience

= you can have 2.5 if you're blonde, female and north American, 2.1 if you're not.

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Work with our fantastic team!!!

= people will smile at you until you sign the contract and then completely ignore you for the rest of the year. The exclamation marks are to get you all excited.

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Send us your resume with recent pictures.

= if you look good you're in. We will never actually read your resume beyond getting the phone number off it.





feel free to contribute more words of wisdom   :undecided:
Imagine your Korea...

Online JNM

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #1 on: January 11, 2017, 09:38:38 PM »
Immediate opening = we treated the last guy so badly that he did a midnight run.

Offline Aurata

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #2 on: January 11, 2017, 11:17:46 PM »
Quote
"One hour from Seoul by travel"

= One hour from the outskirts of one of Seoul's satellite cities.

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Enjoy Incheon!
Speciality: Bibim nengmyon
Places to visit: Jondeungsa (temple), Incheon bridge, Chinatown
Representative flower; Mugunghwa

= You won't actually get time to enjoy these "attractions" (let alone change your underwear) because we'll be working you like a cart horse.

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Close to public transport

= close to a bus that you will have to wait half an hour for, that then takes 45 minutes to get to the nearest subway.
Imagine your Korea...

Offline some waygug-in

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #3 on: January 12, 2017, 12:00:06 AM »
You guys have to stop focusing on all the positives.  :azn:

Flexible curriculum =  no textbook or resources of any kind.

training provided = here's a textbook, have at it.  :wink:


How about those EPIC ads that say "urban school" 

 = the school is somewhere within the school district, but in a very rural setting.


Motivated learners = totally  unrealistic expectations.


« Last Edit: January 12, 2017, 12:19:48 AM by some waygug-in »

Online Piggydee

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #4 on: January 12, 2017, 07:28:39 AM »
Paid overtime:

(Just for the first hour, every hour after that is free labor for us)

Your lesson must meet XYZ academy's criteria.

(if not then we will come into your class and yell at you in front of the students.)

Offline MintIceCream

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #5 on: January 12, 2017, 07:51:19 AM »
 :laugh:

Up to 10 days vacation: so we'll give you 2 days of our chosing, but we're covering our asses because we did say up and not exactly 10.


Also, that whole thing about being yelled at in front of class. I genuinely hope any folk that's happened to have not stood up for it. I'd go mental.

Online Piggydee

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #6 on: January 12, 2017, 07:56:24 AM »
:laugh:

Up to 10 days vacation: so we'll give you 2 days of our chosing, but we're covering our asses because we did say up and not exactly 10.


Also, that whole thing about being yelled at in front of class. I genuinely hope any folk that's happened to have not stood up for it. I'd go mental.


10 days vacation (that we will let you know about a week before you can have off so have fun buying airline tickets and astronomically high prices ) LOL

Offline Aurata

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #7 on: January 12, 2017, 11:19:46 AM »

Quote
22 Teaching hours

= actually this can be anything between 40 and 60 actual hours of your time because we get to creatively define what an 'hour' is
Imagine your Korea...

Online Piggydee

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #8 on: January 12, 2017, 11:53:38 AM »
Here's a good one....

You must reflect well on the school. 

(You can't smoke outside your apartment because if a student sees you and tells their parents you are in BIG trouble.  Single women must remain single until they leave Korea they are not allowed to be seen in public with someone of the opposite sex) 

Please dress in proper attire.

(Men if you have a beard, shave it!!  Little Minji/Minho will have bad dreams about your beard and tell their mommy they don't want to go to scary teacher hakwon anymore. Despite the fact that Jesus, Santa Clause, and the men on their money have facial hair.   Ladies wear a skirt and don't be a sl*t and show your shoulders.)


Offline Aurata

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #9 on: January 12, 2017, 01:33:12 PM »
Single women must remain single until they leave Korea they are not allowed to be seen in public with someone of the opposite sex) 

  ;D they do seem to want their staff to be whiter than white even though the director is usually just about the slimiest most immoral person you could possibly meet.

Quote
We are looking for positive and outgoing teachers

= we will do everything in our power to undermine and utterly demoralize you but we expect you to keep happy and smiling 24/7
Imagine your Korea...

Online donuts81

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #10 on: January 12, 2017, 02:00:19 PM »
Female teachers only = Your boss is a pervy ajoshi  /you'll teach pervy businessmen

Female teachers preferred = your boss thinks women are weak willed and easier to bully.
"You can't hurt me now, Mr Lee. I've lost all feeling"

Online eggieguffer

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Re: What job ads really mean.
« Reply #11 on: January 12, 2017, 04:58:32 PM »
Female teachers only, please send a recent focused photograph. Preferably send a few different photos of face and entire body shots. 

- No real need to paraphrase.